Blog

 1/23/2025

The Home & Home with Apache Wells is over. Day 1, last Tuesday, on their course caused a bit of concern for the CRMC team. We were down 66-42. You could hear the rumbling. Guys were bending my ear like crazy. "Why did Craney have to leave?" "Is the new guy from Fargo any good? (He won a KP over there.) "Where is Steacy, Mitch, Chafin, Pendorf, Gedi, Gibson, Beardsworth, McCaffrey, T. Brinkman and Rowbotham?" Patience, I replied. It is only day one. We always do better at our course. "Randy knows what he is doing." "Trust his wisdom." "Sure the low guys got shellacked, but it won't happen two days in a row."

     Sure enough you guys rallied as expected and predicted. We ended up winning 119-97. Everyone came through, especially the last third listed. You guys went 44-28. The middle third went 41.5-30.5 and the first third kind of held their own by going 33.5-38.5. You all deserve a pat on the back. Way to go Randy, you're a fantastic captain. Pat who?

     The undefeated teams (6-0) were Carpentier & Smith. Baer & French, Stockton & Peterka and Sylvas and Runge.

     Tocheri & Theessen were a stellar 5.5-.5.

     The wonderful 5-1 teams consisted of Stearns & Coole, Scrougham & Kiefer, Anderson & Moltz, J. Robinson & Wedderburn. 

     The splendid 4.5-1.5 partnerships were Mealey & Phinney, Elliott & Biddle and McLaren carrying Taylor.

     Pettay and mostly Young, after talking to him, went a respectable 4-2.

     The magnificent 3.5-2.5 teams were Kruger & Mack, Craney & Kemp, Ede & Spooner, Ostrander & Shostak, Lehr & DeCoursey and Anhorn & Pederson.

     Next week's game is 1 gross and 1 net. The week after that is our Member/Guest tournament. It is a best ball each day. Those sign up sheets should be on the wall.

     Those having birthdays this next week are Jim Perry on Monday, Mike Woltering on Wednesday, Bob "Forever" Young on Thursday. (I would bet his team wins the Men's club game.) Terry Lobdell, Joel Otto and William Walters on Friday. Wish them a happy birthday if you see them on their special day.

     And remember, if you ever need your windows cleaned or other handyman chores accomplished, consider calling James Gloss Window Washing. He is very thorough and you will be glad you gave him a call.

1/18/2025

Well, the member/member is in the books. The four flight winners are Craney & Kemp in flight one. They shot 198 or 21 under. Buffmyer & Boss won flight two with a score of 196, 23 under. McCaffrey & Coole won flight 3 with a 201, or 18 under. Flight four was won by Sanders & Kiefer. They also had a 196, or 23 under. Three of the four Wild Cards purchased were in the money, by ending up 1st, 2nd & 3rd. It seemed like another good tournament. Well run by the pro shop, the course is in good shape, the weather was enjoyable and camaraderie was spectacular. (Cup sizes may have been an inch too small?)

     This Tuesday is round 1 of the Home & Home at Apache Wells. They provide lunch around 11:00 and then we golf. Beers after the round on their patio. Round 2 is here on Thursday. Lunch before golf and beers afterwards in our pavilion. Remember to have both of your carts here for the Thursday round. One for our teams and one for your opponents. They will do the same for us on Tuesday. Attached to this email is the list of golfers playing in this event. Make sure you all show up if your name is listed. Every year someone forgets and needs a babysitter to call at the last second. It produces an awkward moment.

     Finally, Arizona Golf Association will issue a certificate to any member who shoots his age. I can submit it on your behalf or you can do it. So, if you shoot your age and want a certificate  for your garage or golf cart roof, get me the date, your ghin #, your email address and your score. Then you will receive a certificate suitable for framing and be famous.

     And remember, if you are looking for a good pizza, consider ordering one from Rosati's Pizza. They make a mean pizza and sponsor one of our tee boxes. You will be glad you gave them a try.

The humble scribe,

Mark Kohoutek

1/11/2025

40 guys signed up to play in this week's 3 out of 4 nets game. Sixteen made money, or 40% of the field. First place went to the team of Maliske, Boss, Atnip & Kiefer. Their score was 206, a whopping 13 under par, and they each won $40.00. Second place , with a 207, went to Kemp, McCaffrey, Perry and E. Paitel. They each pocketed $25.00. Third place was earned by Ede, Clark, Valich & Coole. They each collected $20.00. The final team to win any money consisted of Pettay, Spooner, Theesen & Asleson. Their score was 214 and they earned $15.00 each. All of these scores are under par and the weather was not very favorable. It was very windy and cold.

     There is no game for this coming Thursday, due to the member/member tournament. There will also be no game on the following Thursday, the 23rd, due to the home & home with Apache Wells. The sign up for that event went up on the wall this past week. Let's all get signed up. We have a new tournament chairman, Randy Bishoff, and we need to get his tenure off on a winning note. I hope he is as good as Pat Craney was. 

     I have also been asked to let you know that the member/guest 2 day tournament format has been changed to a net best ball format each day. This way it is not a grind for either player (unless Taylor is your partner), but you will get to play your own ball throughout the tourney. This event takes place on Feb. 6th & 7th. That sign up will go up after the home & home versus Apache Wells.

     This week's birthdays include Jim Kiefer and Ron Schuler on Wednesday and Dave Pederson on Thursday. I hope Dave can concentrate on the Chapman format and forget about all of his presents and cake he will receive that evening.

     And remember, if your heat pump is giving you any problems during this cold snap, consider calling Double H Heating and Cooling. They sponsor a tee box and do quite a bit of work in Leisure World. They will have your unit providing you heated air or cool air for whatever season it is. 

Your humble scribe,

Mark Kohoutek

1/4/2025

     Ted Brinkman is still basking in the limelight for having a better year than his younger brother. This caused him to mix up the first event of the new year. Our website had it listed as 3 out of 4 net scores. He gave the pro shop a schedule, but it turned out to be an old schedule. It is hard to imagine how a guy as sharp as Ted, and generally recognized as a better money player than his younger brother, could make such a silly mistake. But it happens when you are so focused on last year's results. Hopefully, it will be his last mistake for the year. (Don't bet on it, however, as the year is not even a week old.)

     Payouts were larger due to the larger entry fee. First place, with a 62, paid each team member $70.00. Last year, a $70.00 win would have put you halfway to top ten status. Expect the top ten values to be substantially higher this year. The winning team was made up of Stockton, Buffmyer, Sylvas & E. Paitel. There was a three way tie for second place. These teams had a score of 63 and consisted of Maliske, Clark, Atnip & Rogers; Gibson, Kemp, Theesen & JB Moore and the three man team of Tocheri, Rieder & Phinney (not sure of who is the A player here, so my order may be incorrect).

     I am not going out on a limb and saying what the game is for this coming Thursday. I think Ted is trying to put egg on my face, much like he did to Jim last year. (It looks like it is 3 out of 4 net scores.) I do know this coming Friday is the calcutta for the member/member tournament. Food and drink provided. Five of the seven flight winners from our President's Cup are playing together again. It should be easy to pick and buy winners. Tuesday is the deadline to get entered into this tournament.

     Upcoming birthdays for this week are Bill Moody on Thursday (no doubt he will be celebrating Friday night at the calcutta) and Terry Maddux on Saturday. Wish them both a Happy Birthday if you see them this week. 

     And remember, if you need golf cart batteries, consider using the Battery Doctor. They can install them or just deliver them to your house if you want to install them yourself. They sponsor a tee box and will provide you good service.

Continuing on my journey as the humble scribe,

Mark Kohoutek

12/22/2024

40 guys played in this past Thursday's Men's game. Four teams collected money, so you had a 40% chance of winning some money. Again, those are pretty good gambling odds. The game was a stableford scoring game. There was a tie for first and second at 133 points. Each player collected $30.00. Those teams consisted of McGuffin, Paterka, Sylvas & T. Brinkman (I thought Jim Brinkman was the better golfer of the two, but I always seem to be typing Ted's name. I went back and looked and sure enough Ted has won more than Jim in Thursday events and in tournaments. I wonder what each boy would have to say about that fact? I wonder what their Dad would say about it?) and the team of Walter, Bretzke, Phinney & Rogers. Third place, at 130 and winning $25.00 each, went to Griffin, Boss(man), Gooch & Perry. Fourth place was claimed by the team of Young, Clark (didn't these 2 win the last time they were together?) Vance & Scrougham. Their score was 124 and they each received $15.00. Next week's game is the always popular ABCD scramble and it is the final event of this calendar year. So get signed up and end the year on a fun event.

     Celebrating birthdays this upcoming week are Chris Gant, today Dec. 22nd, Larry Wolkosky (younger) and Bill Phinney (older) on Friday, Dec. 27th. Wish them all a Happy Birthday if you see them.

     And remember, if you want to have a Banner year, consider using Banner Health to help keep you on top of your game (& on top of the soil). They are a triple tee box sponsor, so consider using them if that choice enters into your life.

     And congrats go out to fans of MONTANA STATE and North Dakota State. They will play for the real national championship on Jan. 6th. It is a repeat of 3 years ago. Personally, I am hoping for a different result.

Merry Christmas to you all and I am still trying to stay the humble scribe,

Mark Kohoutek

12/27/2024

49% of you are happy with the above subject title and 51% of you are sad. (Is that a mandate?) However, it is just the last one of 2024. I get to keep poking fun at you all (I miss Taylor. What happened to his game?) for another year. The last Thursday of the year was the ABCD scramble (beerless?) First place, with a 62 and winning $50.00 each, went to the team of Maliske, Peterka, Theesen & Coole (the new money bags?). The team of Kozy, Woltering, Sylvas & Perry took second place. They shot 63 (no doubt 1 putt should have dropped that didn't) and won $35.00 each. There was a tie for 3rd & 4th at 65. They each collected $25.00. The teams were J. Brinkman (finally tying his brother Ted), J Paitel, E. Paitel & D. Vance; (this team could have been an all brother team, but the Brinkman rivalry would have sunk it, so the pro shop steered away from that) and Cota, McCaffrey, T. Brinkman & Kiefer. 16 guys out of 36 (45%) collected some money (& got free beer?).

     My year long spreadsheet has 174 guys winning some money during the year. Here are the top ten for just the Thursday events.

     1) Theesen--$184.00

     2) French--$181.00

     3) Phinney--$170.00

     4) Peterka--$156.00

     5) Maliske--$150.00

     6) Vance--$135.00

     7) Pettay--$131.00

     8 & 9) Powell & B. Kernagis--$130

     10) DeCousey--$125.00

This is an entirely new top ten from a year ago. It was good to see, and even better to not be typing Taylor's name every week (anyone know what happened to his game?) 

     I have already reported on the top ten tournament guys. Now that Thursdays are over for the year, we know the top ten overall (Both Thursdays & tourneys). They are:

     1) Cota--$377.50

     2) Coole--$345.00 (5th last year)

     3) Atnip--$320.50

     4) Boss--$318.50

     5) Stearns--$313.50 (Did his clubs really take a bath in the lake by 13?)

     6) Chaffin--$304.00 (3rd last year)

     7) Craney--$292.00 (9th last year)

     8) Theesen--$284.00

     9) DeCoursey--$278.00 (just squeaking in on both lists)

     10) Hawley--$277.50

     Here are the recaps of dollars earned. Thursday's total pots were $6,667.00 ($6200.00 last year). Our tournaments paid out $15,031.50 ($13,400.00 last year). Overall we contributed $21,698.50 ($19,654.00 last year) into the pro shop's coffers. That has to make everyone happy, even Taylor.

     I cannot tell you what the format is for next Thursday. Ted has not put it up yet on our web page. He has probably been too busy rubbing Jim's nose in their year end stats. I had a lot of shocking inquiries from last week, so here are the final Brinkman results. Ted won $115.00 on Thursdays, $90.00 in the tourneys for a total of $205.00. Jim won $25.00 on Thursdays (Yes, just yesterday), $60.00 in tourneys for a total of $85.00. I am sure Jim's new shoulder surgery had something to do with the difference; but lately, when both are healthy, all I have been typing is Ted's name. I guess we will compare next year. 

     Less than two weeks to get signed up for our biggest tournament of the year. Our member/member. Three days of fun golf (if you can call the Chapman format fun?), 4 nights of drinks (remember the calcutta and trying to hang with the Canadians) and 3 meals. Calcutta is Friday the 10th. The first round is Monday the 13th, followed by Thursday, the 16th and Friday, the 17th. So get your partner (Taylor may be available) and get signed up.

     Upcoming birthdays are Stu Hogue & Terry Steacy on the 30th. (I am flying all the way back just to have a drink with Cat man on his special day.) Nate Naden on the 31st. (I'll bet he has celebrated some spectacular New Year's Eve and birthdays in his days.) Lal Narang and Tom McGovern on the first and Mark Pechman on the 3rd.

     Finally, and remember, if you need to relax and get ready for the new year or need to unwind from all the Christmas activities, consider going to the I.T. M. Thai Massage. They sponsor a tee box for us. They will have you so relaxed and feeling good that you will think you're smoking a joint with ____________ (fill in the blank). 

     That is it for this one. Sorry it is longer than usual, but there was a lot to highlight. Have a terrific New Year and I am still trying to be the humble scribe,

Mark Kohoutek

12/18/2024

Hello Golfers,

Just a short blast to wish everyone a Happy Holiday and Merry Christmas, and to thank you for the great support you gave me and the Board this past year. The time went by fast.

January will see our Past President and long-time Board member, Phil Johnson, retiring from the Board.  He has been there in one capacity or another for six years.  He has been my mentor during this past year and gave me helpful advice more than once.  Phil is our resident expert on spread sheets, and has been the guy who produces the event schedules, and, in cahoots with Kent Gould, has helped nail down the facilities bookings for all our events.  He also is a fount of corporate history regarding Coyote Run and the working of the Men's Club.  So next time you see Phil, give him a large thank you for his efforts.  I hope some Board member is a good spread sheet guy, or Phil might not be able to completely retire!

I want to express my thanks to the Board for being so on top of all things the Men's Club is involved in.  From organizing tournaments and prizes (Pat Craney with help from Mark Kohoutek and ), suggesting improvements in course maintenance and running an active golf advisory committee (Steve Elliot), tracking handicaps and rules changes  (Mark Kohoutek, who is also an incredibly witty commentator of our Men's games), beavering diligently and persistently for sponsors, which is where most of our funds come from (Roger Anhorn), booking facilities and making sure we've got beer/pop/booze supplies current (Kent Gould with help from Bob Rogers and Rod Spooner), keeping our finances in order plus being Vice President and helping me enormously (Kevin Clark), and the guy who has sweated bullets to make the Men's Club website easy to use and up to date (Ted Brinkman). Ted also does a lot of the organizing of the summer men's events.  Thanks to Rick Rumberger who had to resign as Treasurer due to unforeseen circumstances.  Kevin resumed his old position as Treasurer upon Rick's resignation., plus carried out his VP duties.  You folks may not be aware of this, but Rick, Kevin, Phil, and Jim Brinkman were instrumental in bringing to LW's attention the outlandish credit card fees we were being charged, and as a result, the costs have been nearly halved.  Although he's not a Board Member, I want to give a special mention to Todd Stearns, who has been responsible for getting the food on the tables at all our events.  He has been doing this for as long as I've been here, so thanks a lot Todd.  I think Todd will continue in this capacity for us, at least I hope he will.

Come January 1, I will move to Past President, Kevin Clark will be President, Pat Craney will move to Vice President, Pat Burchill will move in as our new Treasurer, and Randy Bishoff will be taking Pat's place as Tournament Director.  Mark, Kent, Steve, Roger, and Ted will remain in place in their current positions on the Board.

Be sure to check our website regularly at lwcrmc.com.  There is always good stuff on it and you can even add your own commentary if you want.  Thanks again to our Greens Stewards (not Green Stewards, as I named them in my last missive) ramrodded by Bob Scheuneman.  That group is dedicated to keeping the greens in A-1 shape, and is very successful at it.  Remember to sand your divots and repair your ball marks, men.  It sure helps with playability.  Feel free to thank the ladies for sanding fairway divots.  They send out the troops weekly to do it.

Keep your heads down and swing through the ball, men.  Cheers to you all.

Rod Spooner 

12/9/2024

Good job gentlemen. After day 1, we had the lead 62-40. We also had the lead 2 years ago (24 point lead) and lost that cup. Last year we were by 30 and held on for the win. This year's final score was 106.5-97.5. They clipped us on their course (home field advantage still applies to old duffers), but only by 13 points. You all came through (most all of you) and we retain the cup. So we sent Pat Craney out as a winning captain. I think he has a pretty good record, but who would not have a winning record with the players he gets to coach. Even though installing the curfew and bed check was unpopular last year, it proved effective and helped create the winning attitude for this years stellar team. Time will tell if our new captian, Randy Bishoff, can fill Pat's Foot Joys. He will get his first attempt next month against Apache Wells. I wonder what new rules and strategies he will install? Kevin Clark accepted the trophy and we proceeded to drink Coors Light from it. (Pat had already left and forgot to leave us the champagne.) See below.

     Special recognition goes to the following teams:

One team went a perfect 6-0. Klaers & Pendorf. They also did it last year. They may have surpassed Elliott as MVPs.

5 teams went a superb 5.5-.5. E. & J.Paitel (5-1 last year. How cool is it a father gets to compete with his son? I just hope no family disputes arise as they are stellar.), Sylwas & Runge (3-3 last year), Powell & Wolkosky (3-3 last year), Stearns & T. Brinkman (also an MVP candidate. This team was put together in the parking lot the Wednesday morning before our Thursday matches. They proved to be compatible.) and finally, new guy, Monty Kuka and his humble partner, Mark Kohoutek.

No one went 5-1, but 4 teams went a stellar 4.5-1.5. Wedderburn & Johnson (second to last team entered),Stockton & Moore, Elliott & Biddle and J. Brinkman & Will. (Brinkmans must have grown up on a country club?)

5 teams went a terrific 4-2. Lehr & Brydon, French & Hemmings, Craney & Kemp, Coole & Maliske and Gibson & Read.

2 teams went a wonderful 3.5-2.5. Anhorn & Hurd and Norton & Ostrander.

4 teams went a respectable 3-3. Kiefer & Sanders, Tocheri & Theesen, Becker & Perkins and Gant & Fitzpatrick.

So congrats to everyone on the team. Even if I don't single you out, you all contributed necessary points toward our 106.5 total.One more guy deserves some recognition. Kent Wenck had a hole in one on Thursday on #13. He wiped out J. Perkins' KP of 4 inches.

     This week's game is the ABCD scramble. Beer after on the pavillion and $15.00 entry fee. Look for the sign ups for the upcoming member/member, whcich starts on Jan. 13th. The sign ups for the next home & home versus Apache Wells should also be going up fairly soon. 

     And remember, if you are thinking of remodeling your house, consider using SJ Buillders. They are a triple hole sponsor. Steve used to live in LW. I am unsure if he still does. However, he has a lot of knowledge about these homes. You will be happy with his quality of work.

Your humble, up north and cold scribe,

Mark (5.5-.5) Kohoutek

12/3/2024

Greetings gentlemen. Below are the rough draft of the pairings for the home & home with Cottonwood. Shane has final say on tee boxes, so be flexible if he changes anything. Tomorrow night is the Holiday dinner dance. Remember two years ago? We had a big first day lead and everyone partied so hard they could not play average golf the last day. (Someone keeps bringing up Clark's name.) Do not overdo it these next few days. Eat, drink, dance and be merry. Just be ready to kick butt on Thursday. This is Craney's swan song, so let's send him off as a winner. If your name is on the list you are expected to show up. Don't be the one guy who every year fails to show up.

     Lunch is provided on Thursday. Also, remember that each team is responsible to provide an extra cart for our opponents. So show up with 2 carts. One for your team and one for the opponents. They will do the same thing for us down there on Saturday. You can park your carts in the parking spots marked in the parking lot that correspond to your starting tee box. 

     And remember, if your heater or air conditioner is acting weird (kind of like Mike Huang), consider using Western States H & C. They are a triple hole sponsor. They support us big time, so let's support them big time. 

Your humble and rarely moderate scribe,

Mark Kohoutek

11/24/2024

Hello Fellows,

This is just to update you on the goings on and some changes your Board has initiated, lately.

First, a reminder to sign up for the Christmas dinner/dance, which will be held at the Hopi/Pima rooms on Wednesday, December 4. The organizers need to know well in advance how many will attend, as there is a lot of prep work that goes into it, mainly by the Ladies Club, so get your names in within the next day or so.

I have attached the events schedules for 2024/2025, and 2025/2026, so print them off and put them on your fridge door, or wherever you keep important documents.

There has been some confusion regarding the Thursday Men's games.  The entry fee for the ABCD game will now be $15.  Last week, the fee charged was $20.  That was a one-off, and the extra $5 charged will go toward purchase of ball mark repair tools for the green stewards.  So, to make things clear, all the regular men's games will cost $10 and the ABCD game, usually held on the last Thursday of the month, will cost $15. I would remind you that all the fees go to the prize money, none is retained by the CRMC.  For all Thursday games, please sign up no later than Wednesday mornings.  The sign up sheet will be in its usual spot in the back room. We would appreciate any feedback you may want to give us, so feel free to respond to my email or to collar one of the Board members.

Next up is the Cottonwood home & home Thursday Dec. 5 here, and Saturday Dec. 7 at Cottonwood.  I see that the sign up sheets are getting full, so if you think you'd like to play, get your name in.  We can pair up singles, if you don't have a partner.  

We've heard complaints about the wetness of the course.  Intense watering is required after overseeding, and since we had to overseed twice because of temperatures, the wetness has lasted longer than normal.  Conditions should be dryer in the next week or two.  

The Green Stewards can always use another worker or two, so if you think you can help, please contact Bob Scheuneman.

We wish all our members, and LW residents in general, a happy Thanksgiving.  Enjoy your golfing, and remember to keep up to the group in front.

On Behalf of your Board,

Rod Spooner 

11/24/2024

Last Thursday's game was what I have often referred to as the ever popular ABCD scramble. Apparently, it is less popular now. The entry fee went from $10.00 to $20.00. A 100% increase is never popular. An unannounced 100% increase is even less popular. I heard some guys had to go home to get extra money. (Also never popular.) Imagine the grief the pro shop and Kevin Clark received. A little (big?) misunderstanding caused the headaches. So in the future the ABCD scrambles will cost $15.00 per person. (How is that for a compromise to appease the masses?) By the way the sign ups will stay on the wall until Wednesday morning until about 8:00 a.m. Earlier I had announced they would come down on Tuesdays, but now you will get an extra half day to sign up. (Another compromise?)

     The $20.00 entry fee did create a big payout. (Popular to 20 guys.) Forty guys entered and 20 got paid. First place went to the team of Linderer, McCaffrey, Gervais & Allinger. Their score was 64 and each received $60.00. There was a tie for second through fifth places. They all shot 65. In order to keep them all happy, there was no scorecard playoff. (Another compromise?) All received $36.00 each. Nutter, Simmons, Jones & DIxon; Kozy, Moore, Appelgren & Glaser; Pendorf, Z. Anderson, Shostak & Rogers and Pettay (finally a win without Young on his team), Stearns, Peterka & Aselson.

     No game next week due to Thanksgiving. Also no game the first Thursday in December due to the home & home with Cottonwood. That sign up is on the wall, so get signed up if you want to play in it.

     And remember, if you ever need an insurance quote for your home, car or anything else, consider calling Matt at State Farm insurance, 480-830-7283. They sponsor a tee box and will be happy to give you a quote to compare with your current policies. 

     Enjoy this upcoming American holiday. Your still popular and humble scribe,

Mark Kohoutek

11/15/2024

 The President Cup was contested over 3 days. We had 7 flights with 8 two man teams. 106 participants. 98 collected some loot. All 106 had the chance for free drinks all three days, one lunch and one dinner. Are there any other events that make such good payouts? Certainly not a Las Vegas slot machine. The seven flight winners were Walter & Perkins (keep an eye on them in the member/member), Dyk & Stearns (another member/member favorite), Chaffin & Wenck (another perennial winner in the member/member), Saks & McGuffin, Dart & Heald, Sylvas & Runge and Fritsche & Glaser. This tournament may have been a test run for the member/member. Keep this info for the calcutta. Also worthy of being mentioned is the fact that Tom Malarkey had a hole in one on #9 the last day. Congrats to him.

     The year to date standings in the tournament section of my spreadsheet show Cota in first place ($337.50), Sonny Chaffin ($289.00) in second place, RJ Hawley in third place ($277.50), Godfrey in fourth ($229.00) and Walters in fifth ($227.00) One more tournament event left. That is the home & home with Cottonwood on Dec. 5th & 7th. We are the defending champs, so we need to try to keep the trophy here for 12 more months. Sign ups for this event should go up this coming week. You can sign up as a team or on the last page as a single and we will try to pair you up if there is room. This will be Pat Craney's last tournament as director, so let's send him off as a winner.

     Next Thursday's event is the ever popular ABCD scramble. Sign up sheets are already on the wall. Beer is supposed to be provided for these events.

     Remember how good the meal was for the Wed. lunch and for the Thursday night dinner? Well, that was catered by Premier Catering, who happens to be one of our hole sponsors. If you ever need an event catered give them a call. They have catered many of the events in LW (golf banquets, dances, Taylor's lunches, etc.). They cook a good meal and know the ins and outs around here. 

Again, this is your humble scribe,

Mark Kohoutek

11/9/2024

 The format for this past Thursday's game was best 3 nets on each hole from your four man team, for 7 teams and who can guess what the 8th team counted. They won by 13 strokes. No one wins by 13, especially if Bob Young is your "A" player. The first place team of Young, Clark (assoc. president, maybe he made a last minute switch without telling anyone), Jones & DeCoursey shot 207 and each received $35.00. Second place, at 220, went to Powell, Markley, Theesen & Moltz. They pocketed $20.00 each. Third place, at 222, was determined by a scorecard playoff. (See all scores are close when everyone uses 3 nets.) That team consisted of Baer, Boss, T. Brinkman & Dalling. They each collected $15.00. Once again 43% of the participants made money.

     One of my duties is to communicate with members of our men's club. (Another is to poke fun at Billy Taylor. That will have to wait until he returns from his all you can eat cruise.) So here are two changes to the Thursday men's events. The pro shop lost one half of an employee. They are now down to 2.5 employees. Consequently, it can be a little hectic there. So sign ups will be taken down Tuesday at 3:00. Pairings will now be made on Wednesday. So don't dawdle. If you want to play, get signed up early in the week.

     The second change is the weekly cost. For the past few years the weekly men's event has cost $5.00 each week, except for the ABCD scrambles. The scrambles have been $10.00. Additionally, the men's association provided free beer during the scrambles. No money was ever taken to cover the cost of the beer. All entry fees in the scrambles were paid out in sweeps winnings.The summer guys went to $10.00 for their weekly events, this will increase pots and will help out the pro shop just a smidgen. Look at it this way, no other club (tennis, pickleball, quilting, shuffleboard, lapidary, cloggers, woodworkers) gives away free beer every week. We are still way ahead of the other clubs by doing it once a month (and at our tournaments). Encourage your buddies to bring a few beers and socialize on the pavilion. One of the many good points of LW is the BYOB feature.

     No Thursday event this next week as the President's Cup is being contested. It is Monday morning and Wed. & Thursday afternoon.Good luck to all participants. (Keep an eye on Young's team.)

     And remember, if you are thinking of buying or selling a house, consider using George Purpura of ReMax Solutions. He has been at it for a long time and knows this market.

Your humble scribe,

Mark Kohoutek

11/4/2024

The first LWMC event for the fall/winter was held last Thursday, Oct. 31st. The format was a 3 man scramble. There were 24 entries. The winning team consisted of McGuffin, Boss & Townsley. They shot 66 and won $40.00 each. There was a tie for second and third with a score of 67. Each of these golfers earned $20.00. These teams were Cardenas, Tocheri & Jones and Elliott, Appelgren & I am assuming T. Brinkman. It looks like the T was changed to a J. (Come on Jim, quit pranking your much older brother. This isn't junior high.)

     This Thursday's event counts your best 3 nets from your 4 man team. Sign ups are on the wall. Also, this Wednesday is the free chicken feed. It starts at 5:00. As always your men's association will be providing the food and drink as long as you sign up by today. Otherwise it will cost you $20.00 at the door. Finally, next week is the President's Cup. This is a 2 man match play tournament. It happens next Monday, Wed. & Thursday afternoons.

     And remember, if you just returned to your home and the heat pump/air conditioner needs some servicing, consider calling Double H Heating and Cooling. They sponsor a tee box with our men's club. And they are the most recommended heating and a/c company on the post. You will be very happy you used them.

Still trying my best to be your humble scribe,

Mark Kohoutek

4/7/2024

As they say in horse racing lingo, this race was won by a nose (and by pluggers). They loaded 22 teams into the starting gates. When the gates opened 21 horses broke from the gate. The Kemp/Voller failed to leave the gate and were led back to their stall. Two other teams stumbled out of the gates.(Ede/Clark & Fish/Anhorn) Both teams missed 1 footers on #1, which led to their elimination. (Now you know why there are no gimmies in a horse race or tournament.) First horse out fast from the gate was the Nunes/Glaser team. They birdied #1. However, no one really wanted to take the lead. Most teams were holding back the reins waiting for the right moment to unleash the whips. There were no chip offs until #4. Teams succumbed to the pressure, water on #3 and simply eliminated themselves. (Made my job easier.) The early leaders, Nunes & Glaser, stumbled on the first turn when Nunes shanked his chip and couldn't get it on the 4th green in the chip off.

     Through 6 holes, 1 team (Phillips/Phinney) had 4 pars, 3 teams had 3 pars and the pluggers had 2 pars. Just when it looked like the early leaders would make a move, they came up lame on the final corner. (A double bogey on #7) After that chip off we were left with 3 teams going into the home stretch.Read/Werschler parred 7 & 8 to grab a bit of a lead. Powell/Rumberger bumped the rail trying to get the inside lane and lost a chip off on #8. (It was evident the longer grass we have faced this year around our greens has changed the way to play our course.) So plodding into the home stretch was Read/Werschler & Maliske/Kiefer, who had 2 pars up to #9. Both teams bogeyed #9. Assistant pro Jed had the brilliant idea of replaying the hole instead of using a chip off to break the tie. He ran the idea past me and Jim Brinkman and we both liked the idea. So back to the tee box they went. This hole sets up perfect for a finishing hole. It is a short drive back for the participants and the crowd can stay in their carts surrounding the green. The second time around, again no one hit the green. Kiefer's pitch shot went right by the hole and rolled into the first cut. Maliske made the putt for a par. Read/Werschler 2 putted for a bogey. So with 3 pars in 10 holes (1 less than the 5th place Phillips/Phinney team), the pluggers, Maliske & Kiefer won the horse race by a nose. You might say they were long shots as only 2 win tickets were purchased on this team. Win tickets paid $122.00 Only 1 place ticket was bet on them and only 1 on the second place team. So each place ticket was worth $68.00. The show action produced 2 tickets on the Maliske/Kiefer team ($79.00), 4 tickets on Read/Werschler ($39.00) and 8 on the Powell/Rumberger team. All in all, we had 2 more teams, more tickets sold, more money bet, more beers drank, more Fireball consumed. better beer cart drivers and maybe less pars and chip offs than last year. 

     Next week is the ever popular ABCD scramble. Only a few more weeks left to our "official" winter season. Get out and enjoy it. 

     We all know how much fun, generous and sincere our men's club is. I want to mention that in the past week two golf events were held by private groups/friends of 2 deceased past members. It gives me a warm feeling to see them playing in memory of Mo and Rummy. Hearing jokes and stories is uplifting.  Seeing pictures of these guys and seeing their wives and daughters serving drinks makes it feel like we are all family. Maybe we are. But it makes me really appreciate this place as the place I chose to spend my retirement years. (Hope I didn't make Taylor cry.) So if you get deceased consider using Mariposa Gardens for your funeral. They won't hold a memorial golf tourney for you, but they will treat you and your family right. 

The humble scribe,

3/31/2024

24 guys entered the Thursday stableford game. Numbers were somewhat low due to the final round of the Coyote Cup. (I'm told the Americans squeaked out the win.) First place, with a score of 92, went to the team of Griffin, McLean, Allinger and DeCoursey. They each collected $18.00. Second place, score of 87, belongs to Fleming, Bussert, Atnip & the new fashionista Joe Moltz. $12.00 to each. 

     Next Thursday is our annual horse race. So far we have 43 guys signed up. The sign up sheet will be up for only 1 more day. If you want in, get signed up. Teams will be drawn Monday afternoon. Remember beer is included and pari-mutuel betting is allowed. Not in that order, however. Bet first, drink second so your bets have a chance of paying off. 

     And remember, if you need to remodel your house, consider getting a quote from Streamline Construction. They are a triple tee box sponsor. They do a lot of work in L. W., know these floor plans and their endless possibilities. So give them a call and get a quote. You will not be disappointed.

The humble scribe,

Mark Kohoutek

3/10/2024

Well, the club championship is in the books. The new champ, coming from the second flight, is Ralph Cota. Ralph shot 150 to beat Pat Klaers by 1 stroke. Congratulations to Ralph. Flight 1 had 16 golfers. Only 1 guy beat net par from this flight. Low gross went to Pat Klaers and low net went to Pat Craney. (It helped to have a first name of Pat in this flight.) Flight 2 was the biggest flight with 17 golfers. 4 guys beat net par in this flight. Low gross went to M. Walters and low net went to Tuffs. Flight 3 had 15 golfers in it. Two guys beat net par, and only by a stroke. Low gross went to B. Ede and low net went to G. Eimantis. Flight 4 had 16 golfers. 4 golfers beat net par. Low gross went to J. Fish and low net went to D. Godfrey. Flight 5 also had 16 golfers in it. 1 guy beat net par. Low gross winner was Atnip and low net winner was T. Reider. Flight 6 had the lowest numbers, with 14 in it. Only one guy beat net par in this flight. G. Coole won low gross and L. Biles won low net. 

     Of the 94 golfers, 13 beat net par. That comes to 14%. To me that is a small percentage. You should beat your handicap 20% of the time and we had it happen 14%. Guess that means there are not very many sandbaggers in our club. It is easy to throw around that name, but the numbers suggest otherwise. (maybe the sandbaggers sat it out? Did Taylor play?) Anyway, good tournament and kudos to the board for facing a tough decision with the rain on day 2 and keeping everyone still involved on day 3.

     The next, and final, big event is our horse race. This will take place on Thursday, April 4th. Entry fee is $10.00. Sign ups will go up soon. You do not want to miss this 9 hole event. Last year we had 40 guys sign up, which created 20 teams. We paid the top 5 teams in sweeps money and the top 3 teams won cash in the pari-mutuel bets. The field will be split in half and teams will be drawn blindly from each half. Beer will be provided while playing.

     Next Thursday is the ABCD scramble. The sign up is already on the wall. And remember, if you ever need your house windows cleaned consider using James Gloss. He sponsors a tee box. Not only does he do windows, but he has expanded to doing light maintenance/fix ups. He has a small crew and can help you out on a lot of different projects. Keep him in mind.

Still the humble scribe,

Mark Kohoutek

3/10/2024

     Well, the club championship is in the books. The new champ, coming from the second flight, is Ralph Cota. Ralph shot 150 to beat Pat Klaers by 1 stroke. Congratulations to Ralph. Flight 1 had 16 golfers. Only 1 guy beat net par from this flight. Low gross went to Pat Klaers and low net went to Pat Craney. (It helped to have a first name of Pat in this flight.) Flight 2 was the biggest flight with 17 golfers. 4 guys beat net par in this flight. Low gross went to M. Walters and low net went to Tuffs. Flight 3 had 15 golfers in it. Two guys beat net par, and only by a stroke. Low gross went to B. Ede and low net went to G. Eimantis. Flight 4 had 16 golfers. 4 golfers beat net par. Low gross went to J. Fish and low net went to D. Godfrey. Flight 5 also had 16 golfers in it. 1 guy beat net par. Low gross winner was Atnip and low net winner was T. Reider. Flight 6 had the lowest numbers, with 14 in it. Only one guy beat net par in this flight. G. Coole won low gross and L. Biles won low net. 

     Of the 94 golfers, 13 beat net par. That comes to 14%. To me that is a small percentage. You should beat your handicap 20% of the time and we had it happen 14%. Guess that means there are not very many sandbaggers in our club. It is easy to throw around that name, but the numbers suggest otherwise. (maybe the sandbaggers sat it out? Did Taylor play?) Anyway, good tournament and kudos to the board for facing a tough decision with the rain on day 2 and keeping everyone still involved on day 3.

     The next, and final, big event is our horse race. This will take place on Thursday, April 4th. Entry fee is $10.00. Sign ups will go up soon. You do not want to miss this 9 hole event. Last year we had 40 guys sign up, which created 20 teams. We paid the top 5 teams in sweeps money and the top 3 teams won cash in the pari-mutuel bets. The field will be split in half and teams will be drawn blindly from each half. Beer will be provided while playing.

     Next Thursday is the ABCD scramble. The sign up is already on the wall. And remember, if you ever need your house windows cleaned consider using James Gloss. He sponsors a tee box. Not only does he do windows, but he has expanded to doing light maintenance/fix ups. He has a small crew and can help you out on a lot of different projects. Keep him in mind.

Still the humble scribe,

Mark Kohoutek

3/2/2024

Last Thursday's game was an ABCD scramble and not 2BB on the first 6 holes, 3 BB on the middle 6 holes and all balls on the final 6 holes. First place, with a 60, went to the team of Buffmyer, Stedeford, new member Lorenz & B. Rogers. (Nice way to welcome a new member. Let him win.) They each won $35.00. Second place, 62, went to the team of Gibson, Virgin, Atnip and Vance. They each collected $25.00. The low front (30) was scored by Cota, Spooner, Fritsch & E. Paitel. The low back, also a 30, was produced by Young, Montgomery, Longpre & Davis. Both of these teams pocketed $15.00 each. There were 36 golfers entered and 16 golfers made money. That means 44% won money. Where else can you get those great odds? (Not counting a Nassua game with Taylor.)

     No game next week as it is our club championship tourney on Monday, Thursday and Friday. Will the GOAT repeat or will a new up and comer win it? We will know next week. And remember, if you ever need your house here remodeled consider using Ashdown Remodeling. They sponsor a tee box and they have extensive business here in LW. They know these houses like the back of your hand. You will not be disappointed.

Your humble scribe,

Mark Kohoutek

2/24/2024

 Thursday's game was low 2 nets per team. 36 players signed up. We paid the top 2 teams. First place, with a score of 126, went to Young, French, Theesen & B. Kernagis. They each collected $25.00. Second place, with a score of 129, went to Will, Montgomery, Scrougham & Gerlach. They each collected $20.00. Next week's game is 2 BB on the first 6 holes, 3 BB on the middle 6 holes and all 4 balls on the last 6 holes. Sign ups on the wall.

     I do not normally go back and talk about the previous week's game, but today it deserves a comment. Remember last week we had an "unofficial protest" as a team felt they won the low back score. Rumors were flying around that all 4 guys had 15 clubs in their bags. One of the more astute members on their team, Kevin Clark, can usually sniff out money. He went home and counted only 14 clubs in his bag. He then asked his team's scorekeeper (a past president of CRMC) about their score. Turns out the scorekeeper never turned in the card. After Kevin's poke, the guy turns in the card on Wednesday. Sorry guys, but the Statute of Limitations had run. Don't expect to bring in a late scorecard and have it count. The teammates can look somewhere else for their winnings. 

     We are about half way into the winter season. A money update is in order. The top 5 in strictly Thursday games are French ($113.00), Scrougham & Hemmings ($72.00 each) and Longpre & B. Kernagis ($70.00 each). The top 4 overall (Thursdays and tourneys) are RJ Hawley ($172.50), Chafin ($144.00) & Cota and Phillips ($137.50 each). 

     And remember, if you ever need to have a ding in your golf cart or car fixed, consider using Touch Up Pro. They have done a lot of work in LW, have been a tee sponsor for a lot of years and get great reviews. 

     Until next week, I'll still try to be a humble scribe. (He brought it in on Wednesday?).

Mark Kohoutek

2/17/2024

 First item on the agenda is the Home & Home with Apache Wells. We entered the final day with a 81-27 point lead. They beat us over there, but barely. We managed to win by a final score of 126.5-89.5. The pep talk about winning it for the "Mitcher" worked (although he went 0-3 over there. He claimed he was being a good sport since we had the big lead). We had 4 teams go 6-0 for this event. Those teams are Dyk & Becker, Ede with Godfrey & Werschler, Hawley & Fritsche and Boss & Atnip. Way to lead the way gentlemen.

     There are two things that grabbed my attention. The first one was the fact that one team went 6-0 at Cottonwood and 6-0 at Apache Wells. That stellar team was Boss and Atnip. So give them a pat on the back for being the only team to reach that pedestal. 

     The second thing that grabbed my attention concerns Brooke Ede. I don't know him real well, but he seems like a pleasant guy. However, there may be more than meets the eye with this guy. Brooke did not go 12-0 in the 2 Home & Homes like Boss & Atnip, but he came very close. He ended up going 11.5-.5 This is a fabulous record, however, he did it with 3 different partners.Obviously he carried his teams, but how come a guy goes through so many partners? Back home in Montana, if you go 3-0 all the time, guys are beating down the door to be your partner. Yet, he can't retain them. Is he that difficult to be around? He doesn't come off like that, but some people hide their faults very well. 

     The second thing on the agenda is last Thursday's ABCD scramble. We had 56 players enter and paid one half of the field. The winning team (64) was Anhorn, Baer, Coole & E. Paitel. They each collected $35.00. Second place (65) went to Elliott, French, Atnip (again in the money) & Davis. They each won $30.00. Three teams tied for 3rd at 66 and each collected $15.00. These teams consisted of Gibson, Markley, Fritsche & Caves; Mealey, McLean, Rieder & Townsley; and Ostrander, Chafin, Vance & DeCoursey. The low front score (32) went to Linderer, Eimantas, Stefanowski & Perry. The low back score (33) came from Young, Godfrey, Allinger & Stagmeyer. These guys each collected $15.00. Rumor has it that the back side score was protested and is under review. Something about all 4 guys having 15 clubs in their bags. 

     This coming Thursday's event is low net foursome. Sign up sheet is in the lounge area. And remember, if you ever need golf cart batteries, consider using the Battery Doctor. They can fulfill all your golf cart battery needs. From 36 volts to 48 volts and even lithium batteries. They are a double sponsor and are worthy of your business. You will not be disappointed.

Your humble scribe,

Mark Kohoutek

2/6/2024

This is as close as you are going to get to golfing today. Here are yesterday's ABCD scramble results. First place (60) was produced by the team of Levenstein, Tocheri, Shostak & Hemmings. They each won $40.00. Second place (61) went to Craney, McLean, Atnip & Kratz. They each collected $30.00. Third place (62) went to Fitzpatrick, Godfrey, Longpre & B. Kernagis. They each received $25.00. The low front score was a 31. That team consisted of Read, French, Knapke & Stagemeyer. They each doubled their money. The low score on the back was a 30, which is 7 under par with 9 holes to go. (How can you shoot 30 on the back and not be in the top 3?) They too doubled their money. Maybe they knew they had doubled their money and quit early to get into the coolers. This early drinking team consisted of Pettay, Spooner, Scrougham & Caves.

     There is no game next Thursday due to the first day of the member/guest tourney. The next scheduled event, after the member/guest, is day 2 of the Home & Home with Apache Wells on Tuesday, Feb. 13th. So far the only ones to say they cannot play on the 13th are Pettay (probably wants to get into the women's coolers this time?) who is replaced by Buffmyer; Stearns, who is replaced by Coole; Markley, who is replaced by Loewen; Longpre, who is replaced by Weedburner; and Schafer, who is replaced by Shostak. Any other changes?

     And remember, if you are experiencing golf cart troubles, consider calling Arizona Golf Cart Repair. They are a double tee box sponsor. They have many years of experience in this area and can get your cart back on the road again.

Humbly yours,

Mark Kohoutek

1/26/2024

Well, this Thursday's event went very well for us. We are leading at the halfway point by a score of 81-27. You would think the "W" is in the bag. We only need 28 points to hold the cup for one more year. However, we have seen a 30+ point lead disappear. Because of our stellar showing the board feels it is in our best interest to continue doing what we did for day one. So no free messages for everyone the morning of Feb. 13th. Sorry, but I tried. 

     The second round will be Feb. 13th at Apache Wells. Lunch will be served at 11:00 and golf starts at 12:30. I expect a few conflicts with the new date. I know 3 of you have let me know of conflicts. Please, if you cannot play on the 13th let me know (or find a replacement), so I can make sure we have a full team. Beers will be after the round and hopefully Pat Craney will be hoisting the trophy again. You know he has a pretty good record as captain for these Home & Homes. I sure hope he doesn't leave us for a bigger paycheck.

     On a lighter note, Pat is not perfect, however. He is the one who normally measures the par 3's and writes it on the little sign on the tee box. He was not here for the member/member, so Phil Johnson filled in for him. Phil read them early on day one and marked each par 3. Unbeknownst to him the flags were changed late in the morning. Pat is back in town and reads the flags for the Thursday event. Unbeknownst (I like this word)  to him his rangefinder was on meters. So that explains that day's discrepancy. I heard the board is accepting volunteer apps for the par 3 measurer.

     On a heavier note, there are 2 issues that need mentioning. One deals with no-shows. This Apache Wells match had one team sign up and then decide not to play. However, they went out and played in the morning. Shame, shame on you two. Another individual signed up and was paired up, but failed to show up. Maybe these individuals do not understand the format and work that goes into pulling off these match play events. Both teams try to get 36 teams (72 golfers). Each team has a team go against another team. There are lots of emails going back and forth with changes. It involves team captains and pro shops. We realize injuries occur, family & friends come into town, etc. But have the decency to show up if you sign up or to notify someone earlier than the day of the event. There was some grumbling to ban guys from playing in these events based on unexcused absences (no doctor's note). No one wants to exclude anyone from our events. So think of others and give adequate notice. If you sign up, be committed. Everyone has a pretty good time, even if you do lose. So show up, play and enjoy yourself. I do want to give a shout out to Bob Schueneman and Fred Schafer. This team was put together around 10:30 to replace the 2 who cancelled and went out in the morning. These stellar substitutes never knew each other, yet jelled enough to go 3-0. Kudos to you two new friends or acquaintances.

     The second heavier note concerns being good stewards of the course. Superintendent Duffy and his staff are to be commended for getting our course in fabulous shape. It is up to all of us to ensure it stays that way. Last Thursday was a "cart path only" day. However, one member took it upon himself to drive anywhere. He claimed he had C.O.P.D. Unfortunately, that isn't grounds for breaking the rules. This same guy has been talked to by Duffy and Shane. Maybe a public admonishment will help? Maybe a fine will help? Lots of golfers skip "cart path only" days due to bak backs, knees, age, etc. If you have bad lungs, are lazy, have bad knees, did I mention lazy, have a bad back, are lazy, feel entitled to drive anywhere because you pay for a season pass or whatever other reason you feel entitles you to bend the rules, forget about those reasons. Be a good steward of the course. In fact, we all have the responsibility to call out or challenge any member of our golfing group should they violate a known rule. Don't be complacent. As stated earlier, the course is undoubtedly the best it has been in quite a few years. Let's all work to keep it that way. Pairing up in carts, no carts on the par 3's and the rangers are helping. Probably 95% of you are doing your part. Keep it up.

    So much for being the bad guy, so back to a lighter note. (Taylor as the lighter note? I think not.) Over the years I have heard many of you ask, "how can we get Taylor back to Australia?" I may have a solution. One of our tee sponsors is the UPS Store-Sprouts. I know they ship about anything anywhere in the world, even Australia. Not sure they will take a human male, but it may be worth checking into. Of course, if it is possible, it will require numerous donations. That may be a high hurdle to overcome. He is very popular, engaging, funny, good golfer and easy to understand. Anyway, consider UPS to ship anything anywhere. 

The humble scribe, not usually a stern one,

Mark 

1/21/2024

 This week's event was the ABCD scramble. 62 guys entered. It took a score of 62 (-11) to win. The winning team consisted of Gibson, Malarkey, Longpre & Townsley. They each collected $45.00. Second place (-10) went to the team of Klaers, Werschler, McGowan & Gillard. They each won $38.00. Third place was determined by a scorecard playoff. Four teams tied at -8. The team to emerge in third place was Buffmyer, French, Scrougham & "Ace" Hemmings (He had an ace last week on #6, was in the hole in one club and put on a good party Wed. afternoon.) They each won $32.00. Low front (32) went to Pendorf, Lehr, Phinney & B. Kernagis. Low back (31) went to Eimantas, Clark, Shostak & Decoursey. These 8 golfers each pocketed $20.00. So 32% of the golfers who entered this event won money.

          And remember, if you ever need some relaxation, try a Thai Massage. Go to I.T.M. Thai Massage. Rumors are Gibson, Malarkey, Longpre & Townsley visited them last Thursday morning. It led to a team win. If we are leading after Day 1 versus Apache Wells I will personally put in a request to our board for the whole team to get a massage the morning before round 2. (Don't schedule it yet. Wait until you hear from me.)

Trying to maintain the humble trait,

Mark Kohoutek

1/13/2024

     The first big Tourney is in the books. The overall low score belongs to Levenstein & Coole, with a score of 200. (They also were overall last year with a score of 197.) How do they keep going under the radar? Don't be throwing that sandbagger term around again. These two are just naturally gifted golfers. The flight winners were Phillips & Cota (204); Nunes & Harrison (207); Levenstein and Coole (200); Lehr & Decoursey (212) and Rieder & Pederson (206). Reider played mostly by himself  for 6 holes in the scramble while Pederson figured out how to bend over and tie his shoes. This tourney will be remembered for the cold and really windy second day.

     Another number to remember is 103. That is the length in feet of putts made by Lobdell & Jonasen just on hole #11. They won long putt on the same hole all three days. Their putts were 43 feet, 16 feet and 44 feet. Nice little cash score for that team. Finally, of the 5 wild card teams only 2 of them placed in the money. One did real good. Sylvas & Runge got second place. The other one, Mealey & Phinney, barely made it onto the podium in fifth place. We need to do better research next year.

     This Thursday game is the ABCD scramble. You can sign up in the golfer's lounge. There is also a sign up sheet in the lounge for the Home & Home event versus Apache Wells.This event takes place on Tuesday, Jan. 23, at Apache Wells and then we play here on Thursday, Jan. 25. We have held this trophy for at least the last two years, so get those good teams signed up. We want to keep it here for another year. 

     And remember, if you ever get that craving for a good pizza, don't forget about Rosati's Pizza. They sponsor a tee box. They have awesome pizzas. Pick one up (or 2 if your name is B. Taylor) and bring it home. You will be a hero.

   Still the humble one,

Mark Kohoutek

1/6/2023

     The first Thursday event of the year is in the books. And the book looks very familiar. 27 guys signed up. Three man teams and you counted your 2 lowest scores on each hole. First place (139) went to Anhorn, Taylor & Voller. They each collected $17.00. (Is Taylor going to go wire to wire in the money race? Has that ever been done before?) Second place (141) was Young, Mitchell & Theesen. They each collected $14.00. There was a tie for third and fourth place (142). These two teams, Montgomery, Spooner & Townsley and Craney, Phinney & Rieder each collected $7.00. 44% of the field won money. Just signing up for the Thursday game is like going to a bank cashier.

     There is no game next week as we have the second round of our member/member tournament next Thursday. However, we will have heavy frosts next week in the mornings. I have been told the frost damages the bermuda more than the rye if walked or driven on. (Did not have to research this statement. It came from someone I halfway trust. Not Mitch) So, if there is frost on the course stay off of the bermuda first and foremost. Just stay on the cart paths. Our course looks amazing. Let's keep it that way.

     And remember, if your teeth are bothering you, (kind of like Taylor always winning bothers you) consider going to Town Square Dental. They sponsor a tee box and will have you flashing that smile in no time. Anhorn goes there and looks at how he is always smiling. (Course first place helps, too.)

    Your humble scribe,

Mark Kohoutek

12/10/2023

We just finished the home & home with Cottonwood Country Club. Many of you will remember last year's debacle. We were up 55.5 to 31.5, which is a 24 point lead, after day 1. Last year the boys partied too hard and too long. Day 2 resulted in Cottonwood beating us by 24 points. So they retained the cup (folklore has it due to Kevin Clark's missed 3 inch button the last hole of the day.) This year we were up 67.5 to 37.5 after day 1. Captain Pat Craney took note and installed a curfew and bed checks for Friday night. (Only 1 team failed.) Well, it worked. We lost day 2 57-48, (home field advantage even applies to old duffers) but the lead was so great this year that a 10 point deficit on day 2 wasn't enough for a comeback. So the trophy is back on our soil for a year (Probably in Craney's living room right now. Feel free to stop by, take your picture with it and send in your Christmas cards to all of your buddies.) Congratulations to all that participated.

     Special recognition goes to the following teams:

     4 teams went a stunning 6-0 (1 team last year. Who needs Elliot & Buffmyer?) Pettay & Young, Klaers & Pendorf, Loewen & Malarkey and quite possible MVP candidates Boss & Atnip. These guys were the 36th team to sign up and Cottonwood only had 35 teams. But we reached out to them at the Christmas party, due to an illness, and ended up waving them in Thursday morning. Pretty good fill-ins.

     6 teams went a superb 5.5-.5 (only 1 team last year). Mitchell & McLaren, Ede & Wedderburn, Beardsworth & McGowan, Townsley & Moltz and in his final real competition before a shoulder replacement, Jim Brinkman and his humble partner, Kohoutek and Jonasen & putter boy Clark.

     1 team had a wonderful record of 5-1. J. Paitel & E. Paitel

     4 teams had a magnificent 4.5-1.5 record. Fitzpatrick & Gant, Kozy & Chafin, Rumberger & Gervais and Read & (most improved) Becker.

     1 team had a stellar 4-2 record. Cardenas & Will.

     1 team has a respectacle 3.5-2.5 record. Eimantas & Taylor. Guess which team failed the curfew and bed check?

     5 teams had an even 3-3 record. Tuff & Gibson, Powell & Wolkosky, Jones & Spooner, Hawley & Fritsche and Runge & Sylvas.

     Good playing by you all. Thank you for supporting this event. From my standpoint it was fun, festive and we played against 2 wonderful gentlemen. I hope you can say the same. Next Thursday is the popular ABCD scramble. Also the sign up for the Member/Member tournament went up. The calcutta is Jan. 5th and the rounds of play are Jan. 8, 11, & 12. (Keep an eye for teams mentioned above as worthy calcutta buys.)

     A couple of final points. Joe Moltz had an ace a few Thursdays ago. That is quite an accomplishment. So what if it required a driver. He did belong to the hole in one club and collected some extra cash to buy drinks for all witnesses. Did you know you can join the hole in club at the pro shop or you can opt in via your AGA online membership renewal. Keep it in mind. I have also been told to remind you all to renew your memberships by year end. Failure to renew will not allow you to play in any Men's Club events. The Thursday events or the upcoming Member/Member. Every year 1 or 2 fail to renew in time, sign up for the member/member and have to be called into the principal's office (Shane) over the loudspeaker and told to ante up or your team can't play. Don't be that guy this year. Some of you have joined as a handicap only member. Probably by accident. Make sure you join AGA and CRMC if you want to play in our events.

     Finally the final paragraph. And remember, if you ever are in need of funeral care for a loved one (or liked one) consider using Mariposa Gardens. They sponsor a tee box and are close by. They will do their best to fulfill your final wishes..

Your humble scribe and curfew abider,

Mark Kohoutek

12/02/2023

     We had over 20 guys play last Thursday. The game was 3 best balls of your 4 man team. First place, with a score of 207, went to the team of Fitzpatrick, Tocheri, Sanders & Vance. They won $20.00 each. Second place had a score of 211 and won $12.00 each. This team consisted of Craney, "Money Bags" Taylor, Markley & Gillard. 

     "Money Bags" jumps into first place on the Thursday winnings. The top 5 in the overall just Thursday games are Taylor ($174.00), Appelgren ($162.50), Tocheri ($150.00), Kemp ($142.00) and Fitzpatrick ($133.50). 

     This coming Thursday is round 1 of the Home & Home with Cottonwood. We have a full field of 36 teams. They are going to send us their teams on Monday. Round 1 is here at Coyote Run at 12:30. Lunch will be provided before the round at 11:00 in the Hopi room. There will be a beer social after the round on the pavilion. The second round will take place on Saturday, Dec. 9th, at 12:30 at Cottonwood. They too will serve lunch at 11:00 before the round and have a beer social afterwards. Hopefully, Pat Craney will be carrying the trophy back here after that beer social.

     And remember, if you ever need an event catered, consider using Premier Catering. They sponsor a hole and are the business we use for most of the meals at our events. Their food is priced right and tastes good. Just look at "Money Bags." He was a mere 170 pounds when he joined Coyote Run men's club. He doesn't look like a mere 170 pounds anymore, does he? 

Your humble scribe,

Mark Kohoutek

11/18/2023

     The President's Cup finished on Thursday and I had the results by Friday. (What good helpers I have.) It appears the team idea for our match play event was a smashing success. Participation numbers increased a bunch. The last three years, when it was an individual event, produced numbers of 67, 83, 77. This year we had 124 golfers. An increase of over 50%. Looks like the "mostly understanding" board knew what they were doing with the change. Good job guys.

     The 8 flight winners were Baldwin/Buffmyer (heard this was an easy bracket); Elliot/Johnson (another win for Elliot in a match play event. Remember Cottonwood last year?); Bishoff/Clark (heard they caught a HUGE break in round 1); Mealey/Phinney (a consistent winning team in the member/member tourney); DeFuria/Saks (another member/member pairing that has a good track record); Kernagis/Kernagis (New to the group. Heard it is a grandfather/grandson pairing); Coole/Rieder (heard Coole was looking for a horse to hitch to and he found a good one.); Biles/Gooch (heard this was the toughest bracket of them all). 

     They each won $70.00. Second place teams don't get mentioned, but do get $40.00. Consolation flight winners also do not get mentioned, but they received $30.00. I could go on and on, but suffice it to say the rest got around $10-20. Almost everyone received something except the 4 teams that went 0-3. Those 4 teams are, oops, gotta stay humble. 

     So my winnings spreadsheet has the winnings based on just the Thursday events since Jan. without the tourneys and summer months. I did add columns for the tournaments. Based on the tournaments the top 4 guys are Phillips ($265.00), Eimantis & Rieder ($210.00) and Gerry Coole ($202.00). Another tight race with one more tourney left, Cottonwood home and home. 

     No Thursday game this week. Enjoy your time with family and friends. We all have a lot for which to be thankful. Signups should go up on Monday for the home and home with Cottonwood. This event is Dec. 7th at Coyote Run and Dec 9th at Cottonwood. We don't want to see the collapse like last year. (Start mimicking Elliot's behaviors.) Sign up as a team if you have one. If you are a single player and want to be paired up, then sign up on the last page under the "alternate" section. You won't be an alternate, but this way it will be easier to know who the singles are and Craney and I will pair you up (hopefully with no personality conflicts).

     And remember, if you ever need your golf cart repaired give Arizona Golf Cart Repair a chance. (480-861-1436) They sponsor a tee box and can fix just about anything on your golf cart. (Not you swing, however.)

You humblest scribe,

Mark Kohoutek

11/14/2023

 I just found out today about the payouts from last Thursday's men's event. Someone dropped the ball when it came to notifying me of the results. However, I am not naming names (yet). First place, with a score of 199, went to the team of Ostrander, Godfrey, Scheuneman & Hemmings. They each collected $20.00.. Second place, with a score of 201, went to the team of Will, Kemp, Voller & Townsley. They each pocketed $12.00.These winnings helped move Randy Kemp into third place on the money list. His $142.00 is still short of Appelgren and Taylor. However, there is still plenty of time left for all golfers to make their move.

     Now remember, if you ever want to sell your house (why would you ever move from this piece of paradise?) or buy another one in LW consider using our very own ReMax office. Not only do their realtors Scott Mack and Dan Callahan sponsor a tee box, but so does the ReMax office. By using their office your own homeowners association reaps a small profit on every sale. So it is a win-win situation.(Much like having Taylor, Appelgren or Kemp on your golf team.)

      Still your humble scribe,

     Mark Kohoutek

11/03/2023

     Well, the first big Men's Day event was held last Thursday. About 50 guys signed up. The first place team (62) consisted of Linderer, Consistent winner B. Taylor, Atnip & Coole. They each collected $55.00. Second place (63) went to J. Will, Chafin, Glaser, & J. Moltz. They each collected $40.00. Low front nine (31) went to Elliot, Defuria, T. Brinkman & F. Townsley. Low back nine (32) went to P. Johnson, Runge, Scheuneman & Hewitt. These guys each received $15.00. So 16 of the 50 (33.3%) received more than their money back. 

     Remember last year when it seemed like B. Taylor was always collecting some dollars? Well, over the summer I built a spreadsheet with every week's winnings. Here are the top five money winners year to date. Appelgren ($162.50), B. Taylor ($160.00), R. Kemp & Tocheri ($130.0 each) and Linderer ($120.00). There are no more games scheduled for November, but 3 more in December. If you want to be known as the #1 money winner, you better enter these last events. (After the President's Cup I will give you the standings of the Thursday events with the tournament payouts. Taylor doesn't shine so much in the tourneys.)

     And remember, now that you are back you may be thinking of a remodel job or touch up on your house. Consider using Ashdown Remodeling. Damien is a Silver sponsor (2 holes). His crew is currently remodeling the home on the left side of #15's fairway. It is looking nice. Give him a call to quote any job you are thinking of doing. You will be glad you did. 

Still the humble one,

Mark Kohoutek 

10/29/2023

     I guess the actual first Thursday men's event was this past Thursday. There were only 4 teams of 4 entered. So a minor event by all accounts unless your name was T. Gould, G. Loewen, T. Malarkey and J. Moltz. They counted your best three scores on each hole. This team was 5 under and each won $20.00. No other team was under par, so they smeared the others. This coming Thursday afternoon is the popular A, B, C, D scramble. Sign ups are in the golfer's lounge. Coolers will be set out after the round in the pavilion.

     It was also brought to my attention that the Memorial/Battle of the Sexes has been changed to Sunday, Febr. 18th. The new schedule is attached and includes the 2 man horse race next April. Mark your calendars accordingly. 

    Still just your humble scribe,

    Mark Kohoutek

10/4/2023

Hi Men,

I hope you've has a really good summer golfing, visiting , or whatever you may have been up to.

There are a couple of things I want to bring to your attention: As many of you are aware, both Coyote Run and Heron Lakes courses have been fighting a rearguard action for many years over the very existence of the courses, mainly over the HOA subsidies paid each year to defray operating costs of the courses, Coyote Run being the main target. The LW website states that there are 2664 homes and condos in the park. According to many years of calculations, the HOA portion for the course has varied from $12 to $19 per manor per month, and I think in 2023 it was $15.50.  The total outlay in latter years has usually been in the $500,000 to $600,000 range.  Many of the non-golfers in LW consider it a subsidy, and, at some of the general Board meetings, complaints about this cost have been loudly registered.  Requests  and even petitions  calling for removal or reductions of the courses have been discussed at Board meetings for years. Your CRMC Boards have tried to emphasize the benefits to all owners of  having golf in LW, and has tried to illuminate this fact to the LW Board on many occasions.  We are trying again to emphasize to the LW Board and LW owners that it is simply another amenity for the benefit of everyone in LW.  I understand that there have been cost/benefit analyses done over the years that show the courses lift the average value of a Manor by 15% to 17%..  We have also tried to draw parallels with other LW amenities paid entirely with HOA fees.  Examples abound, but the most costly ones that come to mind first are the pools and the exercise room.  I don't have the numbers at hand to show the cost per manor for each of these.  We have also brought up the point that each golfer pays a lot of money to play, but one can play tennis or pickleball for a few dollars per year, and use the exercise room or the pools for zero cost.

What we have been running up against when dealing with these issues is a distinct lack of golf representation on the big board. The past year we had two golfing folks on the LW Board, Dan Callahan, and Virgil Knapke, and they did a fine job of standing up for golfers at the meetings.  I am not sure what their status is this year, but I can inform you that Jim Brinkman, former President of the Men's Club, has tossed his hat into the ring for District 8 in this year's election.  Knowing Jim's extensive career as a professional accountant we feel he would be a strong addition to the LW Board while also being an advocate for golfers, so if you are a resident of District 8, please consider voting for him.

On another note, our fearless leader of the Green Stewards, Bob Scheuneman, is looking for some new volunteers to replace or assist the fellows that have been doing such a great job on the greens.  It's time consuming and demanding, so please contact Bob at 928-242-7177 if you feel you can contribute to the upkeep of our fantastic greens.  I've heard that they are far and away better than many of the courses some of our guys have played on this summer, and much of the reason for this goes to Bob and the Stewards, along, of course, with Duffy and his crew.  One last thing.  Bob will be leaving LW in May, so please consider stepping into his leadership roll.  It's a very demanding job that Bob has defined by his conscientiousness and volunteerism for all our benefit, so I hope one of you can carry on after him. 

See you at the Annual General Meeting November 6.

Rod Spooner 

4/22/2023

     Thursday's event was a 2 man scramble. I am not going to pick on anyone today. So no 43 golfers and B. Taylor. I'm just going to say we had 22 teams entered this week. First place was a blowout. Tocheri and Stedeford lapped the field. They took first with a 58 and each won $30.00. Nice shooting. The next place winners were close. P. Klaers & Buffmyer and Heald & Dart tied for second and third with a 64. They each won $25.00. Fourth and fifth place went to J. Paitel & E. Paitel and the team of Kozy & Harrison, with scores of 65. They each won $15.00. You had a 23% chance of making money.

     Next week's game is total low net of your foursome. This is my last humble article of the season. I have enjoyed penning these weekly blasts, recognizing the good scores and taking a few shots at the guys who have thick skin. I am hoping you will have me back next November when the season kicks off with the famous ABCD scramble.Enjoy your summer wherever you get to spend it. We will see you next November, God willing, back here in our amazing slice of paradise.

     And remember, if you need your golf cart worked on before you put it to bed for the summer, or if you want it looked at once you return, consider using Adobe Golf Carts. They sponsor a hole and know how to keep your golf cart running.

Humbleness is in recess until November,

Mark Kohoutek

4/15/2023

Gentlemen,

 Lately there have been many rumors floating around LW about the current LW Boards activities that affect golf. As of this email: 1) Fiber Arts and the Computer Club have agreed to swap rooms in Rec 1. If implemented, this agreement takes remodeling Rec 3 Heron Lakes Club House to include Fiber Arts and eliminate the ProShop off the table. 2) Hiring a “management company” for golf has been researched and rejected. They wanted tee times, restaurant and bar open to the public (no personal liquor on LW property + ends our gated community) and everyone should disagree with that radical change to LW.  

 We have a team of Coyote Run Men’s Club (retired) professionals experienced in Golf Course finance and management who are reviewing LW financial reports to understand why and where LW reports show “losses”. Needless to say the devil is in the details which we don’t currently have. We have scheduled a meeting with finance to answer our many questions with the goal of working toward a better understanding of the results of golf operations and probably making specific detailed suggestions to provide us the information needed to make knowledgeable intelligent decisions that will improve golf operations and our courses. Shane and Duffy’s input and buy-in are prerequisite to any recommendations we may have. 

 Shane and Duffy have done a great job this year (with help from the rain) and our courses are on track to be better next season and in the future. We need to support them at BOARD and DISTRICT meetings to continue to make progress. 

BOARD MEETINGS AND DISTRICT MEETINGS:

 We all have been negligent in not showing up for these meetings. Leisure World is a unique facility here in Mesa and the valley. We want to make it the best possible. The squeaky wheel gets the grease! Not showing up tells the Board we don’t care what they do, and do to golf is what they will. We need members to step up and start attending both the open Board meetings and your District Meetings now! The next open Board meeting is Wednesday 19 April at 1:30pm in the Rec 1 Ballroom. District Meetings are listed in the LW News. 

 All the summer residents please show up for those meetings and make your presence known to the Board and District Representatives. 

ATTEND MEETINGS MESSAGE:  

 We all moved into a “retirement community” with 2 golf courses and many additional “amenities”. None of the LW Amenities (golf, pickleball, tennis, health club, pools, lawn bowling, billiards, etc) generate revenues payable to LW that exceed expenses. Our HOA fees support “all LW amenities”. All LW residents are “in this together” to pay for these amenities. Golf is the largest budgeted “amenity” in LW and charges fees to participate. All the other amenities operating costs are covered by our HOA FEE. Any additional facilities will affect all our HOA fees for construction and maintenance. That is the message that must be delivered to all residents. If you don’t want to pay for “amenities” you don’t use, move elsewhere! 

BOARD ELECTIONS:

 There are 4 board positions up for election next fall. Districts 1, 3, 5, and 7. If golfers don’t run other groups will run their members and we will not be represented. If any golfers have thought about serving Leisure World and golf now is the time to STEP UP and support your home. I guarantee you will get all the support you need from Coyote Run and Heron Lakes members and players.  

THE GOLF SEASON:

 We had a good turnout for our tournaments this season even with the coldest wettest winter in memory. But it was really good for the course. Green Stewards have proven to be a necessary part of golf on Coyote Run. Thanks to Bob Schnueman and all the volunteers! The Coyote Run Women did great work sanding divots too. Our course conditions are a big improvement over last year! 

 We had good numbers from our 7 traditional tournaments and a good turnout for the new Horserace in April. We’ll see that one next year! Thanks to Mark Kohoutek for organizing and Shane, Dan and James for the help. 

NOTES FOR NEXT SEASON: 

The schedule attached is in the books. Put the tournaments on your calendar! Don’t forget the next Annual Meeting Wednesday 8 November and fried chicken when we vote for the 2024 Board members!  New President’s Cup format will be a 2-man team match play event and we play the first day in the morning. Play starts Monday 13 November (play at 8am!) this year so we should see more players. The Christmas Party, hosted by CRWGA, will be another great party with good food and a good band. We had record numbers in 2022 and look for more partiers in December 2023!

 If you know golfers who are not members encourage them to join the good times! 

Thanks to all the volunteers who make Coyote Run a great golf course! 

Phil Johnson

4/14/2023

    The final ABCD scramble of the winter season was held yesterday. Pretty good turnout. I think this time we had 44 golfers. (Can't tell if there were 43 golfers and B. Taylor, as for the first time in a long time, well since the horse race, he is not listed as winning money. So maybe he did not enter?)

     First place (61) went to J. Biddle, K.P. Clark, T. Markley & J. Perry. They each collected $40.00. Second place (63) went to R. Anhorn, D. Godfrey, E. Theesen & T. Brinkman. They each won $30.00.(Theesen has had the pleasure of J. Brinkman and T. Brinkman as partners in back to back weeks. Wonder who he feels is the better partner?) Third place (65) went to J.Kozy, C. Wilkins, R. Rumberger & D. Caves and they each collected $20.00. 

     Breaking even, and collecting $10.00 each and a participation award, goes to the front low team (32) of C. Gant, K. Ostrander, D. Nicholes & J. Moltz; and low back score of 30 to J. Buffmyer(playing in a new shirt), D Simmons, T. French & W. Kratz. (How can you shoot a 30 on the back and not get in the money? All it took was one birdie. Did this team not finish?) Anyway, 20 of 44 guys collected money. That is a 45% chance of winning. Again better odds than most Vegas games. 

     Next week's game is a 2 man scramble. You can sign up as a single or as a team. You will be required to play all 18 holes to collect next week. Probably is considered the last Thursday event of the winter season. In case you ever need to check out what the weekly Thursday event is; ever need to see how big (of a smile?) Gedi is compared to a frowning Pendorf, Phillips, Radke, Read, Reid & Chafin; ever need to learn who sponsors a hole, or ever need anything about the Coyote Run Men's Club you can find it at our website. The address is https://sites.google.com/view/crmcgolf/home. (believe me I did not come up with that one.) 

     And remember, if you ever need a funeral home while in Arizona, please consider Mountain View Funeral. I have heard they do a great job. So give them a chance if things are looking gloomy. You and your family will be happy you did.

The humblest of scribes,

Mark Kohoutek

4/08/2023

     The first horse race in a long time is in the books. We ended up having 40 guys or 20 teams. The top 5 teams collected sweeps money. They were J. Brinkman & E. Theesen in 5th place, going out in a chip off on #6. They each won $20.00. Fourth place went to S. Mack & Narang. They went out on #7 and collected $30.00 each. Third place went to the betting favorites, B. Young and R. Kemp. They were eliminated on #8 and each won $40.00. The final 2 teams each parred #9, so we had a chip off. We had a bit of a hiccup on this chip off and I take part of the blame. However, I don't want it to overshadow a very good chip from B. Appelgren. R. Spooner also hit a very good chip, but not as good as Appelgren's. So President P. Johnson & V. Pres. R. Spooner took second place. They each collected $50.00. That left J. Fitzpatrick and B. Appelgren as the winners, collecting $60.00 each.

     The pari-mutuel betting was also a success. $725.00 was wagered. K. Clark and J. Brinkman got mixed up on how to take bets at their respective windows. Clark caught it earlier than Brinkman as he is a bit smarter. However, Jim realized soon and was able to correct his numerous mistakes. And lo and behold all pots came out exactly correct in the final reconciliation. There was 1 winning win ticket sold and it was worth $125.00. There were 2 place tickets sold on the first place team and none sold on the second place team. Therefore, these two tickets were worth $75.00 each. Finally, in the show ticket category we sold 21 winning tickets. 5 were on the winners, 4 were on the second place team and 13 on the third place team. These were worth $30, $35 & $13 respectively. I counted 29 carts surrounding the final green, a few bikes and only 4 beers left from the three coolers, so I'd say it was a success. Look for it to be repeated next year. A shoutout goes to the pro shop for helping to run it and for setting up the course for some open play and the horse race.

     Next Thursday's event is the last big ABCD scramble of the winter season. Sign up in the lounge area. I have also been asked to mention one more item (and no it is not about sunflower seeds, as they have mostly disappeared, thank you.). Bob Scheuneman handles the 9+ guys who are stewards of our 18 greens. He makes sure they are loaned a ball marker repair tool to help repair ball marks on our greens. Most of these guys leave for the summer. He is looking for reserves to fill in for the summer and could even use a few more names for next fall. If interested, please give him a call, or text, at 928-242-7177. He will thank you, your neighbor will thank you, other golfers will thank you and you will sleep very soundly knowing that you are doing more than the average golfer to keep Coyote Run in the top 10 well manicured courses in Arizona (maybe the western U.S.?)

     And remember, If you ever need your teeth cleaned or fixed, consider Scott  Dentistry. They sponsor a hole for us and produce great smiles throughout the valley. 

3/31/2023

     Yesterday was a stableford format. 36 golfers teed it up. First place, with a score of 146, went to M. Pettay, R. Spooner, B. Phinney & M. Bakken. They each won $20.00. Second place, with a score of 141, went to P. Johnson, B. Porthan, J. Hemmings and (are you sitting down?) B. Taylor. How much has he won? $15.00 more yesterday. I hope he never puts a run in on that sweeps bank, because he alone could cause it to collapse. In third place, with a score of 136, was J. Fitzpatrick, K. Ostrander, B. Appelgren and R. Gillard. They each collected $10.00.

     Next Thursday's game is our first, in a long time, 2 man derby. Notice the names above in bold? All are playing in the derby. Look at those constant winners. Do not forget the multiple wins from Anhorn, Clark, Craney, Kemp, Buff, Powell, Elliot, Pendorf, Young, Brinkman (you guess), Mealey, Sorenson and on and on. Who are you going to bet on? No doubt the early money is coming in on Taylor. But, right now he is an A player. Is he a strong enough player to carry his team? We have 35 signed up. Taylor is the last A player on the list. One more low handicap golfer and Taylor becomes a B player. Then watch for the big money from Australia to come rolling in. If a B player signs up, he stays a B player and the money may swing another direction. Isn't this all riveting? The real big money is waiting to see if Cota, Becker, the GOAT, Mitch, McLaren, Steacy or Gedi are sneaking in under the radar. Who will it be? The Rummy is next week but surely one of those guys can play 3 days in a row. Maybe you will only last 2 holes, so it isn't even considered a round. Every other shot? How tired and sore will you get? Anyway sign up by Monday as we will draw the teams on Tuesday and then watch where the betting money lands.

     And remember, if you ever need your house remodeled, consider using SJ Builders. He's been in LW a long time and has done lots of remodels (reno's for the Canadians) in here. You will not be dissapointed.

The ever humble scribe, with a small bet against B.Taylor,

Mark Kohoutek

3/25/2023

     We had 36 guys play in this past Thursday's game. The format was to count the best 3 nets of your foursome. There was a 2 way tie for first place with a score of 211. The 2 teams were D. Dyk, G Loewen, O. Sorenson, & J. Hemmings and M. Kohoutek (going to be harder to be a humble scribe), B. Taylor (continual winner), T. French & J. Perry. They each won $17.00. Third place, at 213, went to J. Fitzpatrick, C. Sylvas, K. Ostrander & C. Post. They each won $11.00. You had a 33% chance of getting your money back.

     Next week's game is a stableford scoring format. 1 point for a net bogey, 2 points for a net par, 3 points for a net birdie and 4 points for a net eagle. Total all points for the foursome and highest points will be winners. 

     I have another pitch for our first ever derby/horse race, which is being held on April 6th. I had a question on how a derby is run. I answered him directly, but it got me thinking that maybe others have the same question. The derby will be a 2 man team event. It is an alternate shot format. All teams will pick the guy they want to tee it up on #1. Then alternate every shot thereafter, including chip offs. (Right now we have 15 teams, so 15 guys would tee it up on #1.) No handicap is involved (other than picking the teams). All scores are gross, not net. High scores on each hole will be eliminated. (You could pay $10.00 and play one hole. There will be free beer all afternoon. I mentioned this last week and it got B. Taylor to sign up. However, we are missing a few of the Canadian contingency. McClaren? Steacy? Mitchell?) Ties will be broken by a blind chip off. If a team is in a chip off, the guy who did not make the final putt will be in the chip off. All guys in the chip off will have their backs to the green, except the first one to chip. Once the first chip is marked, then #2 turns around and chips. Those farthest away from the hole will be eliminated. Teams advancing will go to the next tee box and tee it up, based on the alternating format. 

     If you don't like this format, please erase your name from the sign up list. We cannot have anyone sign up and not show up. Right now we have 30 guys signed up. If the teams were drawn today we would have 15 teams. We need to have 4 teams on #7's tee box, so based on 15 teams, we would be eliminating about 2 teams per hole. Based on 15 teams the "A" players would be Maliske, Fitzpatrick, Powell, Craney, Elliot, Pendorf, Read, Young, Hawley, Brinkman (not Ted), Buffmyer, Biddle, Kemp, Anhorn and habitual winner, B. Taylor. The 15 "B" players would be Clark, Spooner, Chafin, Loewen, Appelgren, Sorenson, Rumberger, K. Gould, Scheuneman, Theesen, Brinkman (not Jim), Narang, Bakken, Moltz & Gillard. Wouldn't a team of Spooner or Chafin be a lock to win with any "A" player (other than B. Taylor)? If you like that team, or any other team, there will be live, cash betting on win, place and show.

     And remember, if you are thinking of selling or buying a home, please consider Dan Callanhan of our own ReMax Classic office. He sponsors a hole and plays in a lot of our events. I know I pitched Scott Mack a few weeks ago, but Dan has a much lower handicap. I don't know if that means he is a better realtor, but it can't hurt.

Getting harder to stay the humble scribe,

Mark Kohoutek

3/19/2023

    Here are last Thursday's results from the ABCD scramble. First place (61), by a whopping 4 strokes went to the team of T. Gould, J. Paitel, O. Sorenson and H. Hewitt. No doubt this team played real well. However, a hole in one by T. Gould (#6, I think) and a chip-in by Sorenson resulted in 2 eagles, which would provide a lot of their 4 stroke win margin. They each won $35.00. 

     Second place (61+4=65) goes to Lehr, Applegren, Atnip & Townsley. They each collected $25.00. Low front nine (31) went to Kozy, Perrault, Bonjean & Pechman and the low back nine went to the team of R. Rumberger (newly anointed A player) Stedeford, E. Theesen and T. Rieder (not so newly anointed sweeps hog). These guys each won $10.00. Sixteen out of 32 players earned some money. 50% winners is a good percentage.

     Next week's game is best 3 nets of the foursome. Do not forget about the 2 man derby on April 6th. I am still promoting this event a lot. Free beer (Taylor should sign up now) and win, place & show betting on the teams. Right now we have 15 players or 8 teams. Get in there and sign up so you can drink, win some sweeps money, win cash on the bets and heckle your favorite team.

     And remember, if you need your heater or air conditioner looked at before you leave consider using Double H Heating and Cooling. They sponsor a hole and do quite a bit of business in LW.

Always trying to be the humble scribe,

Mark Kohoutek

3/12/2023

The 2023 Club Championship is in the books. Once again 90 golfers and Billy Taylor signed up to play in it. This year's champion is Richie Phillips. This is his 7th title. He won it all in 2005, 2006, 2015, 2016, 2019 & 2021. Not bad for a guy in his late 60's. They say Tom Brady is the GOAT (greatest of all time) for his 7 Super Bowl wins. I think it is safe to say Richie is the GOAT of Coyote Run. The next closest is Dan Brisbin at 4 titles. Congrats to R. Phillips. The other flight winners were Al Read, G. Eimantis, S. Chafin, J. Radke & Ted Rieder (another guy who has a sweeps account as large as B. Tayloy's). Ted really gained on Billy this past week. We paid 51 people out of 91. (56% chance of getting some money back.) Even Jim Brinkman got money back by taking a 10 on #18 the last day. 

     There are too many guys to mention. However, one guy worth mentioning is Jeff Biddle.He won a KP each day. So in the cash department he had the best tourney. 

     Next week's game is the ever popular ABCD scramble. Sign ups are in the lounge area. Also the sign ups for the CRMC derby/horse race is up in the lounge area. Rules are posted. It is our hope that it will be the last big event of the winter season. Beer and win, place & show betting will be provided. Let's have a good turnout, so we schedule it for next year. 

     And remember, if you ever need to sue a bank consider using Kevin P. Clark, LLC as your expert witness. He was president of a few banks that no longer exist in Montana There is no truth to the rumor that he was a bank officer or advisor at Silicon Valley Bank. He sponsors a hole and will have your back if you ever need him.

Still the humble scribe,

Mark

P.S. I have been asked to advise the sunflower seed eaters to quit spitting your seeds on the greens. You can't believe the other requests I get, but this one seems reasonable. 

3/05/2023

 Here are the results of last Thursday's men's club event. First place (62) went to Huang, Ostrander, Torcheri & Glaser. They each won $30.00. There was a tie for second and third (63). Those teams won $20.00 each and consisted of Pettay, Stedford, Loewen & Gillard and Buffmyer, Ede, Weiss & Paitel. Makes you feel good not to see B. Taylor's name in there doesn't it?

     The front nine low score of 29 was from the team of Read, Linderer, Spooner (a C player?) and Rieder. The low back nine score was a 33 and came from Young, Taylor (there goes that good feeling), Simmons & Vance. They each won $10.00. 20 of the 36 guys got their money back. That is a 55% chance of winning. Best odds of the year. No wonder so many guys play in these events. 

     No game next week due to the club championship. Wishing all contestants (even B. Taylor) good luck in the tourney. The sign up for the CRMC Derby will go up next week. Start signing up for the first annual derby. It is going to be a fun event.

     And remember, if you ever need to remodel your house consider using Streamline Construction. They do most of their work in L.W. and are very familiar with all of the floor plans in L.W. In addition, they are a triple sponsor, which helps us out a bunch. Give them a chance to bid on any job, you will be glad you did.

2/27/2023

Last Thursday's event was 1 low ball and 1 low gross ball. 32 guys signed up, which makes for 8 teams. First place went to J. Perkins, J. Beardsworth, K. Clark & M. Bakken with a low score of 132. This is 14 under par. They each collected $25.00 Second place, 5 strokes back, was the team of T. Gould, B. Taylor (does it seem like he wins a lot? Only time he doesn't win is when he is in the witness protection program. You know how guys wonder about the size of other guys' bank account? I wonder about the size of Billy's sweep account. Probably bigger than my bank account.) R. Spooner & D. Caves. They each collected $15.00.

     Next week is another ABCD scramble. My little unscientific survey about the last one had a favorable showing for the new rule. 9 guys responded. 6 like it and 3 did not. 4 guys had the same criticism. They all felt the first 12 hole requirement should be the same 12 holes for everyone. That 12th hole always comes down to 1 guy driving. One team had #18 and the team behind them had #1 as their 12th hole. That is a big difference. So I hope they occasionally keep using the 12 drives in the first 12 holes, but make it holes #1-12. That way 13-18 would be more wide open. This makes it a level playing field for every team. 

     Stay humble, and if anyone hears the exact number of Taylor's sweeps account, let me know so I can report on it.

2/19/2023

 This week's ABCD scramble had 59 golfers and Billy Taylor. That is a good turnout on a not so good day weatherwise. The pro shop added a new twist to this scramble. In the first 12 holes each golfer had to have used his minimum 3 drives. Then it was wide open for the final 6 holes. It would surely add some strategy to the round. Scores were about the same, maybe a stroke higher? I asked Billy Taylor (a nongolfer?) how he liked the new twist and he said he loved it. If you played in it, hit reply to me and let me know your thoughts on this new twist. I'll pass the results onto the powers to be.

     First place (61) went to Linderer, Kemp, E. Paitel & B. Rogers. Another first for Bob Rogers. $40.00 each. Second place (63) was D. Jones, Godfrey, Atnip & Fritsche. $30.00 each. Three teams tied for third with 64's and received $20.00 each. Craney, Tucci, Tocheri & Caves; Koziatek, Beardsworth, Glaser & Allinger; Anhorn, Ostrander, Mourer & Lobdell. Low front (31) went to Pendorf, Simmons, Gervais & Davis. Low back (32) went Powell, Spooner, Longpre & Irving. $10.00 each. 28 guys (47%) received their entry fee, or more, back. So your odds of winning are quite good.

     Next Thursday's game is 1 net and 1 low gross. It cannot be the same golf for both.

     And remember, if you ever have any problems with your golf cart or are in the market for a new one consider using BDK Golf Carts (Action Golf). They sponsor a hole with us and I know a lot of guys have either bought from them or had repairs by them. All seem to be happy with the results.

2/11/2023

Well, the 2023 member/guest is in the books. Flight winners are Goeden & Delozier (214) in flight 1, Will & Cardenas (209) in flight 2, Weiss & Hansen and Kolankowski & McGrath (218) tied in flight 3 and Caves & Gentry (212) in flight 4. Jerry Will definitely carried his team to the winner's circle. He shot 73 on his 70th birthday. Won't be long and he'll be shooting his age every day.

     There are 2 other good stories to report. The first one involves Sandy McLaren and Rick Rumberger. This happened on day 1. Rick makes a long putt on #11. It measured 36'5". Sandy helped measure it. (He was in the construction business and good with measurements.) Sandy proceeds to write down 35'6". He transposed the last 2 digits. (Not a good trait in the construction business!) Lo and behold someone came along and made a putt of 35'11" to win the $100.00. Remember how I built up Sandy for mentoring Mitchell through the home and home with Apache Wells? He is still a good mentor, just not a good number writer.

     Final funny story happened at the end of the dinner. Kevin Clark and I were amongst the last 16 having a nightcap. When we took notice of the crowd we realized 13 were Canadian, 1 was Aussie and 2 were from Montana (Southern Alberta?) Since it appeared we could hang with them they decided to make Kevin and I honorary Canadians. They taught us the secret handshake. This was easy to learn since we are both gentlemen. Then they taught us their national anthem, which also was easy for us. We're both from Great Falls and our minor league baseball team used to play Lethbridge and Medicine Hat. Both national anthems were played at those games, so we are familiar with most of it. The final item to teach us was how to moon a roomful of guys. This came easy to a booze seller, but not easy to a retired bank president. Those guys worry about their reputation. Kevin kept fumbling with his belt and zipper, but said he would practice it and report back at the next dinner. 

     Next Thursday is another ABCD scramble. I want to mention a change to the Thursday schedule. On April 6th we are going to have the Montana Derby. Details are being finalized, but it will be a 2 person team event. All can sign up. The field will be split into two groups and teams will consist of a golfer from each group. We will start on #1 and drop teams as we progress. We will get to where we have 4 teams on #7's tee box, 3 teams on #8's tee box and 2 teams on #9. Included will be parimutuel betting. You can bet on your own team or any other team. Win, place, show and quinellas. So put that date on your schedule. It will be a fun event to end the winter season. 

     And remember, if you need some dental work consider Cory Gile Family Dental Care. They sponsor a hole and will produce a great smile on your face for those winner photos Ted puts on our web page.

Your humble scribe,

Mark Kohoutek

2/05/2023

   Thursday's ABCD scramble had 56 players this past week. Front winners (30) of $15.00 each were A. Read, T. Norkiewicz, O. Sorenson & T. Allinger. Back winners (32) of $15.01 each were R. Anhorn, C. Linderer, R. Schuler & T. Parson.

     Third place overall (61) was the unexpected team of S. Mack, K. Clark, E. Paitel & M. Fritsche. They each won $25.00. Second place (60) went to the expected winners--P. Craney, D. Simmons, A. Kolankowski & J. Moltz. They each won $35.00. The overall winners (59) were A. Mitchell, B. Taylor, B. Tocheri & B. Rogers. They each pocketed $50.00. I personally witnessed this team finish from my patio. Bob Rogers drained a 40-50 foot putt on #4. I then learned they used his drive and his second shot. So it was a hogger eagle and it vaulted them into first place. Nice finish Bob.

     No games for this coming Thursday as we will be having our member/guest tournament. The deadline is tomorrow, so you still have time to sign up.

     And remember, should you ever need to ship a package, use the UPS store by Sprouts. They sponsor a hole and always get your package to the correct destination. 

Still just a humble scribe,

Mark Kohoutek

1/28/2023

Wow, what an butt kicking you guys administered. Final score was 135.5-77.5 in our favor. There are way too many teams above .500 to mention. However, a few deserve some recognition. Six teams went 6-0. Gant/Zrmack, Chafin/Wenck, Eimantas/Taylor, Goeden/Gooch, Sylvas/Runge and French/Hemmings. Nice job, boys.

     Steve Elliott in our two homes and homes has a stellar 11.5-.5 record. I think if you are ever looking for a march play partner, he should be high on your list. Another solid team is Stockton/B. Moore. They paired up in both events and have a stellar 10.5-1.5 record. So there are the main All-Stars for both events.

     Two more guys worth mentioning are Aaron Mitchell and Sandy McLaren. Sandy and Terry Steacy had signed up, but Terry had company come into town. so he had to bail. Sandy asked Mitch to fill in for Terry. (Big shoes to fill.) Sandy and Terry tied for second in the second flight of the member/member tourney. Mitch tied for first in the third flight. Now he is moving up to the big guns. Kind of like a wrestler moving up a weight class or a triple A baseball player getting called up to the big leagues. Mitch was overwhelmed in the round one at Apache Wells. They went 0-3. Sandy kept telling Mitch he was okay, that he believed in Mitch, that he belonged in the bigs (& gave him a couple of tokes). Lo and behold they went 2.5-.5 in day two. Way to go Aaron and Sandy for mentoring him through the matches. As I have said before, it is hard to believe we need more Sandy's and Mitch's, but we do.

     And remember, if you need any paint touched up on your car (or cart) think of Touch Up Pro. They sponsor a hole and have a great reputation for quality work here in LW. They will even come out to your house to do the job.

     Again I would like to advise you of next Thursday's Men's day game, but it still isn't updated on our website. I needled Ted Brinkman, our webmaster, about it. His reply was that it was in Phil Johnson's hands. Everyone passes the buck on this subject, don't they? Don't ask me why the 2023 Thursday schedule is not updated, as I am.

Just a humble scribe.

Mark Kohoutek

1/21/2023

 An ABCD scramble was held last Thursday. The winning team, with a 61, was Mealey, Kemp, Mourer & Shostak. Second, with a 62, was Young, McLean, Appelgren & Kratz. Third, from a scorecard playoff (63), was Pendorf, Beardsworth, Werschler & Stagemeyer. Low front (31), again from a scorecard playoff, was Mitchell, Will, Gervais & "Stink Eye" Bill Gee. Low Back score (31), another scorecard playoff, was Pettay, Stearns, Rumberger & Gilliard. Twenty of the 52 players recouped their money.

     Heard a few stories about eagles. However, all were on par 5's. Those were not worthy of being mentioned when put up against Gerry Coole's hogger eagle on #11. He drove the green and stepped right up to make the 18 foot putt. His first eagle in his life, albeit from the yellow tees, but who am I to rain on his parade. 

     The other story I heard was about "Stink Eye" Bill Gee. Here is an 85 year old gentleman being accused by A. Mitchell as swearing and demeaning him with his eyes. Claims Bill gave him the stink eye. I find that hard to believe from the guy who posted the second most rounds in 2022, and may be the nicest 80+ year old in our club. Maybe Aaron has a slight paranoid streak? 

     There is no day game next Thursday as that will be day 2 in our home and home match play with Apache Wells. Hopefully, I'll be able to report a better outcome than I reported on the Cottonwood match.

     And remember, if you are looking at selling your house, give some strong consideration to Scott Mack, a local ReMax expert. He sponsors a hole, supports our tournaments year round and can almost always get your house sold.

Still a humble scribe, but willing to rain on your parade,

Mark Kohoutek

1/15/2023

Well, another member/member tournament is in the books. Flight winners were Bo Powell & J. Buffmeyer (198), J. Mealey & B. Phinney (198), tie between A. Mitchell & R. Schuler & M. Levenstein & G. Coole (197), J. Bonjean & J. Radke (201) and L. Biles & O. Peralta (199). Congratulations to all winners.How many flight winners were wild card teams, you ask? Wild card teams won flights 4 & 5, did not place in flights 1 & 2 and took third in the third flight. 

     The final day had 139 individual scores. 95 (69%) produced a net score of 74 or above. 9 net scores (6.5%) were right at even par 73 and 35 (25%) net scores were 72 or lower. So 34% of the scores were par or better. Statistically you should shoot par or better 20% of the time. We are above average. There were six 69's and they came from M. Jochner, M.Virgin, D. Goeden, J. Radke, O. Sorenson and K. Gould. The one net 68 was from Bill Phinney and the lowest net was a 67 from Gerry Coole. Again congratulations are in order. 

     There is another interesting tidbit from this tournament that I want to bring to your attention. Two teams wore matching shirts on the last day. This is quite common in female golf tournaments. The two teams were S. Mack & B. Scheuneman and P. Craney & R. Kemp. Neither team placed in the money, so keep that in mind if your partner (or wives) suggest matching tops. 

     I would like to tell you about the upcoming Thursday men's event, but the 2023 schedule is not on the CRMC website yet. T. Brinkman has not flipped his calendar yet. Sign ups should be in the lounge. I know the sign ups for the Home & Home with Apache Wells (Jan. 24 & 26th) and member/guest are up. Let's fill up that home and home sign up. We hold that trophy and need a strong team. So you 31 percenters get in there. 

     And remember, if you need any painting done on your home in LW, or back home if you can afford to fly him there, consider Willis Painting. He sponsors a hole and does a good job. Take a look at T. Steacy's house in a few weeks for the proof.

Your humble scribe,

Mark Kohoutek

1/8/2023

Last Thursday's game was another ABCD scramble. It was an attempt to get your scramble game ready for the member/member tourney. You have already seen the results from the pro shop. So no need for me to rehash that, other than to point out the winning score of 61 was produced by T. Jackson, Al Read, M."the" Virgin and D. Stagparty. Looks like all 4 man teams, so a pretty level playing field.

     No Thursday game this week as that is day 2 of the member/member. Calcutta was Friday night. First pick, often referred to as the "wild card' in each flight was Gant/Walter, Dyk/Stearns, Baldwin/Taylor Gooch's dad, Bonjean/Radke and Biles/ Peralta. The Walter's group bought 3 of the 5. Good luck to all participants and remember only 14 clubs in your bag. 

     In case your windows are looking splattered after all of this rain consider a call to Gloss Window Washing, (480-326-8276) another hole sponsor and clean and meticulous. You will be glad you did.

     Finally, congrats to all of you South Dakota citizens. You are finally a national champion. 

Still as humble as ever,

Mark Kohoutek

12-31-2023

 The last Men's Thursday game of the year was held a few days ago. The top two teams consisted of 3 man teams. In addition, the low front ( a 3 man team) and back teams got paid, much like a participation award. Both of these winners were determined by a scorecard playoff. 

     The winning team, at a 60, consisted of international players. J. Stockton (a 3 time winner, definitely hot calcutta material, sure winner if his partner can do anything), B. Taylor (back to back first places, another hot calcutta prospect), and F. Townsley (back to back first places in these scrambles). Second place, with a 62, was a team consisting of all Sweet 16 players. R. Anhorn, G. Coole and perennial placer J. Perry.

     The low front team, with a 31, consisted of P. Klaers, E. Theesen  and L. Biles. The low back team, with a 32, was the only 4 man team to place. (Am I the only one to see a pattern here?) Members were M. Huang (remember him driving #10 and not placing?), Arnie Palmer, B. Rogers and J. Nell.

     Winners collected $35.00 each, second received $25.00 each and front and back (participation awards) received $20.00 each. So you had a 39% chance of getting more than your money back. Up from the last scramble percentage of 28.5%. 

     Happy New year to you all. If you've got no plans for tonight, consider having a nice meal at Rosatis Pizza. They sponsor one of our holes and serve a good meal. Or you can stop by Billy Taylor's house for a free beer. See you in a few hours.

Your excited to arrive and still humble scribe,

Mark Kohoutek

12-23-2023

This is a bit earlier than normal, but it is close to Christmas and I have a great Christmas idea at the end of this message. 28 golfers signed up for Thursday's game, which was 1 net best ball on the par 5's, 2 on the 4's and 3 on the par 3's. Even par would be 133. First place was a score of 123. The winning team consisted of Mark (nice first name & a nice guy) Pettay (2 handicap), B. Taylor (10) (finally got his swing doctor's release), J. Tucci (11) (from last to first) and another Jim, with a last name of Perry (18) (One of the better Minnesota golfers). They won $20.00 each.

     Second place at 125 was J. Stockton (6 and another 2 time winner. Calcutta material), P. Harrison(7 and super green steward on #10 & 11), E. Paitel (14 and the second Paitel to place, must be in the genes) and J. Mealey (4, how did this team get 2 A players?) They each won $15.00.  

      They forgot to tell me who took last, so you dodged that arrow this week. We paid 2 of the 7 teams, so you had a 28.5% chance of winning some good money. Keep that in the back of your mind for next Thursday's game.

     Next time you need a good massage go to.I.T.M. Thai Massage. They sponsor a golf hole and get your body very relaxed. Rumor has it the winning team met there Thursday morning. A massage would be a great gift for yourself or someone you kind of like or even don't like. 

     Merry Christmas to you all. Still continuing to try to maintain that humble scribe image,

Mark Kohoutek

12-17-2023

  Thursday's game was the Coyote Run famous A-B-C-D scramble. There were 13 teams and we paid the top 4 teams. All the way up north in frigid Montana you could hear the scuttlebutt regarding Mike Huang driving the green on hole #10. Most of the rumors had this approach shot at 10 feet from the hole. I never heard if they made the eagle putt. Mike's putter got bent from Jim Brinkman dropping it on the road a month ago, so I hope his teammates could make the eagle putt for him. Hard to believe if you drive a par 4 you wouldn't win a scramble, but that was not the case with his team. 

     I also noticed that Billy Taylor is back from his stint in the witness protection program. He was not allowed to play any golf while away. His swing doctor has not released him to play competitive golf until he has 4 rounds under his belt. As of last Thursday he only had 2 rounds since returning. So the team of Stockton, Atnip & Gilliard was at a real disadvantage. You probably would've placed as an A-B-C team in this ABCD event. So on behalf of the Keep it Fair on Thursdays committee I apologize to you. I will make a motion at our next meeting that you get a refund on your entry fee. He slipped through the crack and it will not happen again.

     Scores went from a high of 69 (Craney, Tucci, THeesen and Davis) to a low of 61 (Lucas, Eimantas, K.Gould & Townsley). Winners were loaded with Candadians.They each collected $50.00. Second-Fourth tied with 63's. Those teams consisted of Young, J. Paitel and Tocheri (don't ask me how an ABC team placed in an ABCD event), and T. Gould, Linderer, T. Brinkman & J. Nell and T. Jackson, Chafin, Phinney & Perry. They each collected $25.00.

     One thing I did notice was there were three repeat winners this Thursday and the last home and home. They were Chafin, K. Gould and T. Brinkman. You don't have to be a rocket scientist or CPA to figure out these three in all likelihood carried their 2 man teams last week. I point out these repeat winners for your benefit as the calcutta is coming up on Jan.6th. Put them high on your list as teams to buy. They seem to win a lot.

     I am not sure what next Thursday's game is. I have been told there is not a game, that it is 1  BB on par 5s, 2 BB on par 4's and 3 BB on par 3's and maybe 3 BB of the foursome. So keep your eyes and ears open to see if a sign up sheet appears in the men's lounge.

     The final note for this week is a high five to the North Dakota State Bison and the South Dakota State Jackrabbits. Both teams won their playoff games and will be advancing to the championship game in Texas on Jan. 8th.

Still your humble scribe,

Mark Kohoutek

12-11-2023

 In an attempt to have better communications with our members, I have volunteered to start sending out weekly (I hope) emails on the week's past events and upcoming events. So here goes my first one.

     The CRMC just finished a home and home match with Cottonwood. The score after the first day, which was on our home course, was 55.5-31.5 in our favor. This is a serious butt kicking after one day. Rightfully so, the boys celebrated long and hard. Celebrations can never be too hard, but can be too long. Our boys went too long and got roughed up on the road. Evidently home field advantage applies to senior golfing events also. Cottonwood put the exact same butt kicking on us yesterday, so the score ended up 87-87. Since Cottonwood holds the Cup, they retain it for another year with a tie. Next we party hard and short!

     Special recognition goes to the following teams: Only one team went a stunning 6-0, Elliot & Buffmeyer. (Hard to believe we need more Elliots, but we do.)

     Only one team went a superb 5.5-.5, Stockton & Moore (not to be confused with JB).

     Two teams went a wonderful 5-1, the Brinkman twins and Johnson & Rumberger,

     Four teams went a magnificent 4.5-1.5, Peralta/Biles, Godfrey/Coole, Perkins/Walter & Great Falls' own Clark & Jonasen.

     One team went  a stellar 4-2, Tuff & Gibson.

     Six teams (Most in any category) went a respectable 3.5-2.5, Sylvas/Scrougham, mostly Stearns & a little bit of Anhorn, Powell & Biddle (Big & Little), Loewen & Malarkey,,

                      Chaffin & Wenck, and finally Hurd & (he aint no B. Graham, but who is) Randy Bishoff.

     Two teams went an even 3-3, Wolkosky & Longpre and Gould & Gerlach. (Good thing they both went 3-0 the first day.)

     Those going under .500 were , oops we are about out of space, so no room to single them out. (I can't even single out Becker and Moore as the only team to go 0-6.) Good playing by all team members. It is important we support events like these home and homes. Thanks for your support. (Just don't party for two solid days. You're older now and can only handle one day of it.)

     Our next event is this Thursday afternoon. It is an A-B-C-D scramble. Sign up in the lounge. One last note to highlight winners. I know we have a lot of members from Montana, North Dakota, South Dakota and probably even some with Texas ties. So congrats to the Bobcats, Jackrabbits, Bison and Cardinals on their impressive wins in the NCAA FCS playoffs. Let's hope your team wins again next weekend.

Your humble scribe,

Mark Kohoutek